Jennifer teaches and knits- but not simultaneously

Hello? Is anyone (still) out there?

2011-09-15T21:14:00.000+09:00

Wow! It's been a while since I've posted. So long, in fact, that I decided to start a whole new blog. There's an Evil Jenniferteacher out there (not to be confused with Evil Jen), so I couldn't just move over here as Jennifer Teacher. (Note: Actual evilness unproven. Mostly she just has my name.) My *plan* is for this to be a new and improved blog, so 2.0 seemed about right. By new and improved, of course, I mean old and unimproved-- the regularity and enthusiasm for blogging I had in the early (and mid) days of the original blog.

A lot has happened since my posts petered off into nothingness. I won't bore you with the details. I'll just say that most, if not all, of it has made my life happier. If you want to catch up on my daily, or at least weekly, life in the last year or so, you can read about how I've spent most of my weekends and some of my mid-weeks here.

I've just gotten back from my summer holidays, and, unlike my most recent post promising holiday highlights and photos, these will actually get posted. I've written an absurd amount, so I need to pare it down to a length that won't make readers fling themselves out a window to escape.

Fireworks and Football

2010-10-26T10:16:00.014+09:00

I realize I haven't written about my awesome trip to Thailand to see Stephanie, but those photos are at home, and my students are taking standardized Korean tests all morning, so I've got a bit of free time. Sure, I've got some journals to mark, but that's not nearly as fun.

This past weekend, Craig and I headed down to Pusan (Busan if you're new to Korea or Fusan if you're really old) for the FA Cup final between Suwon and Pusan. I didn't get around to booking the tickets until mid-week, so left with the choices of 7am or 10:20am, I went with the latter.

We got into town around 1:30 and headed toward our Saturday destination: Gwangalli Beach, which was having a fireworks festival. After the longest cab ride I've ever had that didn't begin with me taking the wrong bus to parts unknown, we arrived at a strip of sand which seemed to have been named "beach" by the same folks that have labeled every hill in Korea a "mountain". At any rate, we were ready for lunch and could see the ocean, so some seafood seemed in order. I was cold, of course, so I wanted soup.

So, the local Nolbu Budaejjigae seemed a decent choice. I don't eat spam, so budaejjigae wasn't an option (to me, anyway, I think Craig was game). Fortunately, they had dak kalbi with seafood. Not soup, I know, but warm, delicious, and containing seafood, so it met our requirements. It turned out to be a great choice. There were mussels, shrimp, and baby octopi aplenty. I went for the first two and generously saved the cephalopods for Craig. I have agreed to try san nakji with him, but no need to rush things.

Once we'd eaten until we were ready to hibernate, we braved the cold once more in search of a room. The one place we'd looked at before lunch had posted a sign announcing they were booked up. Fortunately, one street back from the beach was all yogwans, so we were confident we wouldn't be sleeping on the sand. As soon as we saw some people standing on a roof, we knew where to check next: the Hilton/ Hill Top (depending on which sign you read). They had a room, and so we were set. Of course, once we saw what our (by which, I mean, Craig's) 100k had bought, it wasn't much of a mystery why they still had rooms available.

Yep, that's a round bed. See that thing that looks like a mattress pad? Under there was enough hair that it looked like someone had cleaned their brush. We slept on top of the covers.

After our eventful morning of sitting on the train and eating lunch, we were ready for a little rest. So, in the early evening we set out to find a place to sit and enjoy the fireworks. Since people had already been staking out their territory before we had lunch several hours earlier, we thought we might have a fair task in front of us. As it turned out, most places had reserved all their good seats. So we ended up at a "beer garden" (the sidewalk in front of a bar that had been roped off and set up with lawn furniture) which was offering their tables for 150k at the lower level or 200k on the deck. We went for the lower level, and this is what we got:

Well, that plus one more pitcher of beer. Yes, that's two glasses you see. I helped Craig by having half a glass of beer. I live on the edge, I know. I hope he doesn't think I'm a lush now... Being a more adventurous eater than I, Craig tried a bite of the dduk kalbi (my kids complain bitterly when they have to eat it at lunch, so I wasn't too tempted, even with the honey mustard sauce). One bite was enough for him, and we picked at the fries until they were nearly refrozen in the night air. We ended up leaving the soju in our yogwan fridge-- something to help the next occupants overlook the standard of housekeeping. The Pepsi and Cider we left behind, because who would even drink that for free?

After a couple of hours, it was time for the main event: fireworks. By this time, the beach, the road, and the sidewalk had been filled to capacity to the point that the entire waitstaff was standing guard pushing the rabble out of the roped off area. Meanwhile, we sat in comfort (I was even lent a blanket by the bar).

After a pitcher or so of Korea's finest ale, I don't think Craig was feeling the cold as much as I was.

The fireworks were launched from barges literally right off the coast, probably less that 100 yards or so from the beach. They were also launched quite low, so most of them seemed to be right over our heads. We had planned to meet another group of people, but at the last minute, they decided to watch the show from Haeundae Beach. I haven't had a chance to confirm my suspicions that the fireworks were not nearly so spectacular from even that short distance.

It's kind of dark, but you can see the ropes the hoi polloi are jammed up against, as well as how low the fireworks were. From my seat, I missed some of them completely, because they were aimed to line up under the bridge right off the coast.

The grand finale seemed a little like someone had a look at their watch and realized they had run over time. All in all a good show and a good time was had by all, or at least the two of us, with chairs, food and drink, room to breathe, and a blanket. :-)

The real reason we had gone down south was for the FA Cup final, which didn't start until late Sunday afternoon. So, we whiled away the morning with some cultural pursuits, namely the Pusan Museum followed by a stroll around the UN Cemetery. As it turned out, it was UN Day or some such, and we arrived just as a group of important-looking military officers were gathering for a ceremony.

If we'd stayed longer, we might have seen a 21-gun salute. We left just as they were playing the Korean national anthem, and headed to our final destination: the soccer ground.

Since the World Cup and the many new facilities built for it, the host cities mostly have at least two soccer stadiums (stadia?) now. We had a bit of luck and arrived at the correct one on the first try. Upon arrival, we were offered free tickets. After seeing Seongnam for free earlier in the week, I was feeling a bit spoiled and happy to be a foreigner.

After not meeting up with the other group the night before, I was looking forward to seeing them at the game. About five minutes after kick off, I got a panicked call from my coworker which I could barely hear over the announcements and cheering crowd. I thought I heard, "My friend is dead. He's coughing up so much blood." I later learned that one of the guys in the group had had more than his share of refreshments and in his haste to get to a bathroom, he tried to jump across a partition and fell several stories. He survived, but needless to say, they spent the game at the hospital, where he is now recovering.

Our outing was much less eventful. We had also planned to meet up with a guy Craig sometimes goes to matches with-- you know, ones he wants to watch with someone a bit more knowledgeable and enthusiastic about the game. He arrived late, though, and ended up on a different tier than we were on. So, despite initial plans to watch the match with ten other people, we ended up on our own.

We headed back to the station after the awarding of the various medals and the cup and I got home with six hours to spare before my school day started.

Edit: I'm not sure why the photos suddenly disappeared, but I'm trying to fix it.

How I Spent my Summer Vacation

2010-10-07T09:39:00.003+09:00

It has been brought to my attention (repeatedly) that I haven't updated my blog since May. I would say I've been busy, but really I haven't been busier than usual.

The semester came to a rather rushed conclusion, filled with field trips, "experiences"-- to use the Korean teachers' lingo, and swimming and dance lessons. I have some video of the latter which I may post, if I get around to it.

I stayed here for the summer and it was pretty quiet and routine for the most part. As I *may* have mentioned, I live in an old house with "creative" wiring. So, I don't have AC. Summer in Korea is hot and humid and fans don't always cut it, even for cold-natured freaks like myself. So, a fair amount of my vacation was spent reading at Starbucks. I live on the edge, I know.

Mama and Anne came to visit and that was fun. We read at Starbucks together for a week. :-) They missed their flight out, because it was outrageously overbooked, so we made it to Insa-dong and they did a little shopping. Since I was able to stock back up on socks with pictures of crap piles on them, it wasn't a wasted trip for me, either.

The night they were supposed to leave, I stayed out all night. Mama tried not to seem shocked. Hehehe. I felt like a middle-aged rebel.

That was pretty much the high point of my vacation: shocking my mother.

I also did a lot of other stuff, that I would normally think about doing, but then punk out at the last minute. I've been seeing someone for three months now and he not only makes plans (which I'm good at), he does them (which I'm not so good at). If you want to read about all of the baseball and soccer games I've been to, look here. He wrote about the 17 km coastal hike which I managed to both survive and enjoy, too. I will admit that my favorite part was the hotel room with a giant window overlooking the beach, though.

Sorry this is such a boring post, but four months is a lot to cover, so Cliff Notes it is. At this point I should probably make my usual promises to post more regularly... I will at the very least try to get a couple pictures posted.

I haven't been knitting much. I've been into lace lately, and I need peace and quiet to knit it without making a ton of mistakes, so no subway knitting for me. With Craig living all the way across Seoul, that's a lot of knitting time that I haven't been able to make use of. I got an iPod Touch on my Chuseok holiday in Thailand and I've been watching TV instead. Yes, highly productive use of my time.

I suppose I should follow up this post with one on my trip to Thailand. I probably will... I signed a lease yesterday on a fine home in HBC aka the foreign ghetto, so I should write a little post with some photos so you can see how charming and cozy it is. I think those are the proper real estate euphemisms for old and small.

Why I Love Korea #295

2010-05-24T07:44:00.002+09:00

You never know when you'll be treated to a bit of street theater.

This morning, I was on my way to work, just a blah Monday morning, when I came upon today's surprise performance: an ajosshi fight. When I came around the corner of the grocery store next to my school, I saw the dwarfish, slightly slow man that sweeps the delivery area pulling a man in a suit off a delivery driver (OK, I'm not sure he was the driver, but there was a truck and he looked truckerish). The man in the suit was clearly walking his very young daughter to her bus stop. He started to walk away, but then changed his mind and came back to yell at the guy for a bit. If I were Karl, I would have stopped to record it, but they were yelling and being pulled off each other and I have kids to teach.

I have to say, seeing that girl, I felt a bit robbed. My dad was a golden gloves champ, but I never got to see him stop on the street to fight some random guy. Hmmm... my family is campaigning to get me to move back home, maybe I can negotiate something... but I digress.

My point is, even on a drizzly Monday morning, you never know what to expect when you are out and about in Korea. Maybe you'll see a group of teenage boys waiting for the bus with their arms around each other looking like they are posing for a hair product ad. Maybe you'll see a group of ajjumas fighting to be the first in a shop when it opens. And maybe, if you're lucky, you'll see a dad in a suit get pulled of a much-larger working class guy by a slightly oversized dwarf. :-)

Happy Monday!

Blades of Blood

2010-05-08T21:44:00.002+09:00

is a new Korean film starring that guy with the vampire canines that does all of the commercials that Jang Dong Gun doesn't do. I'm sure he has a name, but I just think of him as "Teeth."

Anyway, it was a historical drama from the time of Lee Sung Shin. Usually, I only hear about him and what a godlike man he was, what with the turtle ships and all. This movie only mentioned him in passing and focused on the political drama going on at the time. So, I that was my favorite part. I'm not sure what percentage of the movie was historically accurate (the political stuff, I mean, not the main plot lines), but it was good. There was a completely unnecessary storyline with a gisaeng, but I'm sure someone thought the movie could use a pretty face.

Spoiler alert: the movie has a very depressing ending and there is a lot of blood (first decapitation happens within about the first 5 minutes. Notice I said "first.") Overall, I'd recommend it, though.

It's showing at Yongsan CGV with subtitles and presumably select other locations have subtitles, as well.

No Sleepy Sunday for You!

2010-05-02T15:30:00.008+09:00

Promptly at 7:00 AM the heavy equipment got rolling. When I got home last night, an excavator had been parked for the night on the side of my house, but it was too dark to get a good shot. So, I'll let today's photos of my gate and from my gate suffice. Note: objects are exactly as close as they appear.

In order to actually go through the gate, I've got to step over all of the rusty pipes being replaced. Hopefully, they will take those with them today... I didn't get a picture this morning, but when I went out, there was an open pipe coming out from under my bathroom. Nice-uh. I can only hope that it is the shower drain, and that it has now been attached to something.

Monday evening update: The pipes are laid and covered with dirt. Hopefully asphalt will follow tomorrow. The heavy equipment and pipes are no longer surrounding my house, but the workers are still here. They were yelling at the teenage girls to stop talking so loudly as I walked up the street on the way in from work. Pretty rich coming from men using jackhammers and excavators at 7AM on a Sunday. I also noticed that a small chunk of the side of the house has been knocked out. Fortunately, it's just cosmetic. And not my property. :-)

Saturday evening update: After a short period on Friday during which I was trapped in the house, because a ditch had been created, equipment was blocking the gate, and safety lines had been erected to prevent crossing the ditch, had I been able to catapult over the gate (since I couldn't open it). My landlord to the rescue: he came and yelled at the construction guys and they poured the cement and covered it with dirt within about two hours.

I'm not sure what they got done today, because it pretty much looks exactly the same. I did see worshipers trying to leave the temple next door this morning faced with the same ditch. So, the workers are slowly moving down the street, but they can't possibly be done, so I'm not sure why they moved on.

I've also noticed that other houses had larger chunks knocked off the bottom edge by the excavators. I wonder if any of them will get compensated...

Tomorrow, I'll try to get a shot of the street as it currently looks. Due to the widening, the electric poles are now in the middle of the street. Nice-uh. I've seen too many concrete barriers get taken out by cars trying to get on (or off) the sidewalks to think that those skinny little poles are long for this world.

Open Class survived, now on to Field Day

2010-04-27T08:34:00.004+09:00

Last week, I had Open Classes for the parents to observe me in action. For the past while, I've had increasing issues with the chattiness of the class. Of course, for the Open Class, you might have thought they had taken vows of silence. The other 4th grade teacher and I had planned what we thought the parents would like to see: reading, speaking, and writing in one class. The reading was limited to phrases (the students were given cards with phrases on them to hang on the wall to match to the correct category) and the writing was a group effort on the board. The speaking was a non-starter. No one wanted to risk making a mistake in front of their parents. Later, my partner teacher told me that the parents would have liked the kids to play a game. Seriously? I don't recall playing too many games in elementary school, and am pretty sure my mother wouldn't have taken that as a sign of good learning going on if she had come to observe.

That was last week. This week, we will have a Field Day on Saturday. All day. 8:30-3:30. To "prepare", we are taking the first 90 minutes of school each day this week to practice. The students have to stretch and then practice the prescribed cheers and hand jive. The stretching is clearly a routine they know well, which is a good thing, because when we got started yesterday, I found out that I was supposed to lead my class. I "led" by watching what my students were doing. The students also had to practice a relay race which was run by two teams made up of one boy and one girl from each class. There are about 20 classes. By the end, I felt like I was watching a marathon.

Tomorrow, the kids have midterms, so I won't have any classes. One of the moms will come to proctor, so I just have to sit here quietly. Next week, we only have a full day on Monday. Tuesday, we have Children's Day ceremony, then the rest of the week off for Children's Day.

I like time off as much as the next person, but I've got a lot of material to get through this year, and I'm already skimming over most things far more than I would like.

Nothing Says "I want my kid to succeed" quite like this

2010-04-20T09:52:00.003+09:00

I've got a few posts I've been sitting on, mostly because I haven't uploaded the photos from my camera, but here is a quickie, thanks to my phone camera.

My students had to bring plants in a plastic bottle planter for their Korean science class. Most of the kids brought water bottles or soda bottles, but one kid (whose name was not on the bottle) brought this:

That's right, a two-liter soju bottle. Hehehe. If it were for my child, I might just go out and buy a bottle of soda (or water), so it wouldn't look like the only two-liter bottles lying around my house were ones which previously contained grain alcohol. If my frugal nature prevented such an extravagent waste of a dollar, I would at least have removed the soju label to pass it off as a cider bottle. But that's just me.

I'm Not Exactly Sure What Happened, But I Definitely Gave Something

2010-03-30T15:35:00.004+09:00

I went to the hospital and gave "blood" which involved me being hooked to a machine with multiple bags and an alarm that went off about every 90 seconds for the nearly two hours that I was attached to it. I felt really bad for the nurse, because I arrived as they were all scooting out the door and she had to stay. Then it took two hours (plus rest time after and set up time before, so really, over two and a half hours). She couldn't even get anything done because she had to babysit the machine. I didn't look at it, but apparently my blood did not look normal, but all the tests were fine, so whatever. I guess I'm an alien. In addition to whatever issue was causing the machine to beep incessantly and ever-more-urgently.

So, I roll up at home just before 8PM (I went to the hospital at 3:30), and... NO KEY! Grrr... So, I called my landlord, who lives upstairs. No answer. So, I sat there for TWO HOURS until the upstairs light turned on. They had been napping or something (wink wink nudge nudge) the whole time. I called again and they quickly ran out with the spare key. From the embarrassed look on my landlord's face, they had either heard (and ignored) my previous call, or I hadn't interrupted a nap, if you know what I mean. Today, there was a video announcement with a child holding my key, so it is now safely in my bag.

The Ministry of Ed folks toured the school today, so we were warned a week ago to dress up. Of course, I remembered that as I was clocking in. All of the male teachers are in suits and all of the female teachers are in skirts or otherwise dressed up, and then there is me. I decided to wear jeans today, which I do about once every other week. Of course. Go me. So, I've been hiding all day.

Have you heard the one about the yellow dust?

2010-03-29T13:39:00.002+09:00

Okay, there's no punchline. The yellow dust has lingered for over a week now. The worst is over and the sky even looks blue at times, but my throat has been sore for over a week now and when I go outside, I get a nice film of grit in my mouth, even when it's closed. That's got to be healthy.

Things have been busy but good in the Jennifer Teacher household. The KOTESOL Seoul Chapter Conference was this past weekend and it was the most successful one yet. More importantly, the elections were held and for the first time in about 6 1/2 years, I am not on the executive. So, now I just have my secretarial duties for the National Council. So, I should get on those...

School is still awesome, one month in. :-) The other 4th grade teacher and I really see eye-to-eye on what is important to teach the kids, so we've been having a lot of fun planning activities and themes to do with them.

Today, I have to go give blood for a kid with cancer. I have long half-joked that if I ever get in an accident, someone needs to put me in a cab and drop me off at the gates of an Army base. It's a half-joke because Koreans generally do not have Rh negative blood. To the point that many Koreans don't know that such a thing exists, despite their near-obsession with blood type (they use it like a Western astrological sign as a predictor of personality and for matchmaking).

So anyway, a friend of a friend of a friend... has a teenager with lymphoma that needs B- and no Koreans have it. So, I went and got typed last week, because what he needs is more specific than that. I'm a match so I have to go donate today. I'm really not looking forward to it. As the father messages me one text after another, I am trying to keep in mind that he found out his child has cancer last week. But really, I said I would do it. Does it really require reconfirmation every 20-30 minutes? Apparently so. I'll give all the bloody details later. See what I did there? Yeah, pretty clever.

Happy St. Pat's er... PTA Meeting Day

2010-03-17T06:59:00.002+09:00

Well, they've got the same letters, so they should be equally fun, right? Yeah, I didn't think so, either. Apparently, my homework load has been getting complaints. So far, I've given out 10-15 minutes per day, plus one to three writing paragraphs for chatting in Korean or talking louder than me when I'm speaking to the class. Cry me a river. I doubt any kid has had a full hour of homework yet.

How little homework should I be giving? Under ten minutes a day? Under five? Maybe that's why these kids have gone to an immersion school for four years and still can't write a sentence with a subject AND a verb. We won't even talk about articles, because that's a pipe dream.

Seriously, my new job is awesome, but these kids need serious work on their English and osmosis has pretty well been discounted as a way to learn. I'm pretty much living proof-- I've lived in Korea for over ten years, but I speak English at school all day, then come home to my English Batcave, and my Korean still sucks. If I were paying big bucks to someone to improve my Korean, I'd be pretty angry at the return on my investment.

Open House

2010-03-08T20:30:00.002+09:00

So, today was my Open House presentation for the mothers. I was pretty stressed out about it, because a) I hate meeting mothers, and b) I've never done a PowerPoint presentation before (try not to hurt yourself laughing). It went fine, though. The Assistant Director/ Office Manager/ I really have no idea what her job title is translated my slides and everything I said as I spoke and made me feel like a diplomat of some sort. It doesn't take much to amuse me, does it?

After, the mothers of two of my three problem children (pretty Uber-Problem Child's mother didn't attend) asked me how they were doing in class. I was more honest than I normally would be, but I've been laying down the law pretty severely, so I wanted to head off potential complaints at the pass. I told both of them (truthfully enough) that their boys seem to get the material very quickly "so they may get bored at times." By that, I meant they are rambunctious and distract the ones who don't get it so quickly. Both moms seemed to have gotten my drift. :-) One child has apparently complained that I make students wash their hands after they sneeze (into their hands). His mother even went over ways we can cough into his sleeve so as not to have to leave the class. This is the same child that asks to leave the class at some point every day, because he "forgets" to go to the bathroom or get water during a break.

Otherwise, things are rocking along at the new school. Tomorrow, they have a five-period long test, four of which were my classes, so I only have one class. One class got cancelled today for First Grade Welcoming Ceremony Number Two. Since the crowning ceremony last week wasn't enough, I guess. Today, they got leis made of candy and suckers and had to run the gauntlet between all of the other students. An entire hour. Lost. One week in, and I have yet to have a regular school day with them. It would be pretty cool, if it weren't already painfully obvious that we're never going to properly cover all of the material this year. Grand plans of projects and presentations have been washed away by the cold, grim reality that they are the level of the lowest students I taught at Elite. One week in, and we haven't even cracked open half of the books.

One of the students told me on Friday that the Uber-Problem Child would be quitting, but he was in class today. Sigh. In writing class, we did a group brainstorm to make sure they new how to do one, and then they wrote a single paragraph. That just about did most of the kids in, but for UPC... At the end of class, he had written selective parts of the brainstorm on his paper (which I repeatedly told him he did not need to do) and... nothing else. There were less than a dozen words on his page, all copied from the board, and that took him the entire time it took most of the students to complete the assignment. Then he told me he didn't do his homework (again), because he's going to the French school. That should be interesting. I hope for his sake that I misunderstood him, or else that he has a hidden talent for French.

The rest of my kids are pretty awesome, to varying degrees. I can't wait to have a regular full day of classes to see what they can really do.

In other boring news of my life, if you're still reading, I had a national council meeting yesterday. It wasn't as horrible as it could have been. That's the best thing I can say about it. Maybe during the big test tomorrow, I can get to work on those minutes...

Don't Miscarry in Utah

2010-02-27T18:47:00.002+09:00

I clicked on the link to this article, because I think that a lot of students kind of fart around and mark time for their senior year, and the kids that need to be there could benefit from a culling of the herd, so to speak. A focusing of resources, if you will. However, the real subject of the article is proposed legislation in which miscarriages may become a prosecutable offense in Utah.

So, 12th grade may become optional because the government is broke. But it's not too broke to investigate/ prosecute/ imprison women who have miscarriages, if the mother's actions may have been the cause.

What about giving birth to a child with health problems? Will the mother's prenatal care be investigated? Where will it end? While I'm not above giving dirty looks to pregnant women I see smoking or drinking, I'm not sure this is a road the government should go down. In fact, I'm pretty sure this road is a very, very bad one which should be avoided.

Several women close to me have suffered miscarriages, and I can't imagine them dealing with that emotional pain while facing a criminal investigation into the events leading up to it. Not to mention, how horrible would it be to lose a pregnancy and be judged to be at fault for it? How many women go through that in their own minds already, thinking about what they could have done differently and if it would have changed anything? Now, compound that with a police investigation and, possibly, a criminal trial.

I realize that is not the intent of the law, but since the police cannot actually read people's minds, you have to think that at least some women found criminally responsible for their miscarriage would have simply been guilty of poor judgment. OK, I think that's enough of a rant about a proposed law (which one hopes will be quietly dropped from consideration never again to see the light of day) in a state through which I have never even driven, nor do I have any future plans to visit.

The End Draws Nigh (as does a new beginning)

2010-02-25T21:35:00.004+09:00

Tomorrow is my last working day off of work, if that makes sense. I've been to my new school several times to clean up and moderately decorate my new classroom. OK, thus far "decorations" have been limited to classroom rules signs which I have posted. :-) Just trying to live up to my reputation. When I interviewed, I was asked how my director would describe me. When I said I might be considered a little strict at my school, he laughed and showed me the notes from his conversation with said director: the first word was strict.

Since it is the end of our rather unproductive vacations, Stafford and I have planned to do things which we should have done at a leisurely pace throughout the past two weeks. I still haven't convinced him to accompany me to the robot art exhibit. :-( Hopefully, the French comic exhibit he chose will be just as good.

Laundry Time

2010-02-24T23:11:00.002+09:00

So, as I may have mentioned, my month off of work has been rather slothful. My cat is making a silent, but pointed, statement about the laundry pile on the floor. He has pushed all of the clothes into a semi-circle around his head and upper body. He is now slowly rolling from side to side, stopping at each item to touch it several times with the nearest paw. It's like watching some kind of weird geriatric stretching video. Or, maybe if the subject of an episode of Hoarders came out with a line of exercise DVDs...

At any rate, I will grudgingly take it as a sign that it's time to make the two-block trek over to the laundromat. Stafford has some super-exciting product launch to attend tomorrow, but I suppose washing clothes, dropping some pants off to be altered, and going to Korean class will be just as awesome. Not that I'm bitter that he didn't even try to get a plus one. What kind of party requires everyone to go stag? Hrmph.

I am Legal!!

2010-02-23T23:10:00.002+09:00

I went to immigration today and picked up my brand spanking new ID card. Once again, I was hit with the realization that it's not Korean Immi in general, it is specifically the Mokdong office that are the largest collection of idiots in the nation. This was the my third (fourth?) trip to the Jongro office and the difference is unbelievable. They know what they are doing! They do it!! In a timely manner!!! I use more Korean at this office, but seeing as it's the lingua franca, I guess I can make a minimal effort...

I had Korean class tonight-- we're into the third week now. I'm definitely not learning as much as the last time I took Korean classes, but that was 10 hours a week with another 10 of homework, compared to 3 hours a week with little to no homework. I could put in the extra effort on my own, but obviously I haven't done that the whole time I'm here, so why change midstream? That's like suggesting I socialize in Korean. I dislike socializing in English and that takes 1/1000th the effort. At any rate, I am learning some and I'm enjoying it so far.

I got an email from my new school today: I have to prepare a powerpoint presentation for the Open House. A what for the what?! Eek. I'm going in tomorrow to put my room in order and start getting ready for next week, so I'll have a talk with the principal about this Open House.

I can't believe my month off is nearly over. I have been so completely unproductive. Completely. I had a list of things to do, like go through all of my boxes in the storage cubby and throw out everything I don't need, organize my bookshelves/ drawers/ cabinets/ etc, organize my yarn stash... I think you can see a pattern emerging. Anyway, it doesn't matter, because my books/ shelves/ drawers/ cabinets/ boxes/ yarn are nearly as disorganized as the day I moved in.

I wish I loved exercise, cleaning, and organizing as much as I love sitting in my computer chair staring at my laptop screen. :-)

Signed, Sealed, and Delivered

2010-02-16T13:09:00.003+09:00

As usual, way too long since my last post.

I finished up at Elite at the end of January and am halfway through my vacation. Today, after sweating for months when my FBI background check wouldn't (and still hasn't) come in, I went to immigration, and got my new visa with no background check needed. If only I had known that I didn't need to spend all that money and hassle (mostly my mother got hassled, with several trips around Baton Rouge getting my local check and apostille) and stress over the missing FBI check. I mean, four months?! Come on!

As for my vacation, I've been pretty supremely unproductive. I have knit two sweaters: Owls (still needs eyes) and Amused, modified into a hoodie cardigan (still needs closures). Both were quick and easy knits, although, I didn't really follow the patterns all that closely. For Owls, I basically only used the "owl" cable chart.

Over the Lunar New Year/ Valentine's Day weekend, Stafford whisked me off on a "staycation" at a hotel here in Seoul. He's so sweet! We spent most of the time watching AFN and going to Starbucks. He knows me so well. :-)

So, that's about all that's gone on over the past month. Not very eventful, despite big plans to get out and about and see all the things in Seoul I haven't seen before. Mostly, I've just seen a lot of TV downloads in my living room. There are two exhibits at two museums I do plan to see over the next two weeks, though. Staf's on vacation, so maybe I can drag him along...

Leading and Retreating

2010-01-04T17:03:00.002+09:00

Once again, it's been ages since I posted, and I've got no real reason. I just got back from the KOTESOL annual Leadership Retreat, which was much more useful this year than in years past. I had my first council meeting as secretary, and don't think I missed too much. :-) We'll see when I send copies of the minutes around...

It's been snowing all day, so it took me three and a half hours (standing) on the bus instead of the usual thirty minutes. Sigh. There were men manually shoveling snow on the highway. So, we would drive a meter or two and stop and wait. I got there in the end, though.

On the PBMX front, he has decided that Korea was a great place to live and work and doesn't understand why I won't help him get a job. He still hasn't done anything about the divorce. So, I think I'm just going to have to redo the paperwork and file myself.

I guess the only other thing on the burner is ThaiTESOL's annual conference at the end of the month. I'm always so busy at the conference here that I rarely get to see many presentations, so I'd kind of like to go to another conference. The fact that it's in sunny Thailand is a bonus. We'll see if I can get organized and arrange tickets and hotel...

So, all caught up on the past month or so of my life in just a few hundred words. Sad, isn't it?

Everything but the Bathroom Sink

2009-11-28T18:55:00.003+09:00

Once again, another month has zoomed by. As I begin my last (!) month at school, I've been stressing about finding a new place to live, as well as rethinking my decision to have two month holiday between jobs, since I'll be broke by the time I next get paid.

Anyway, after a short, but stress-filled search for an apartment, I found a place that is the right mix of close to school, cheap, and big-enough-for-all-my-crap. It wasn't easy, especially since my new school is near a couple of unis, so most of the cheap accommodation is the size of a closet. I found a place that is walking distance to school, in a house (so I don't have to worry about loud college students), and big enough for all my crap.

I went to view it before school one morning, so I made the most of the trip to "the city" by having other viewings directly after. So, it was a bit of a whirlwind tour. As soon as I saw it, I wanted it. It looks like a five-year-old added it on the rest of the house. Since I was in a rush when I saw it, I didn't look closely for things like power outlets. I confirmed that each room had them when I called to say I wanted the place. I had had two places snatched out from under me, so I didn't want to waste any time getting this one. The landlord assured me there were outlets in any room.
Which there are. They all look like a college dorm-- every room has extension cords which have the overhead lights plugged into them.

I tried to post photos about a dozen times, but Blogger is being a bit R-word.org. If you're my FB friend, you can see them there, in all their glory.
***

Things have been pretty busy here over the last little while. Since the summer, I've been working on the International Conference. It finally happened last month. I was elected secretary of the National Council, so now I'm getting a handle on that. It's a bit more involved than the "take minutes at the council meetings" job description I was given. Sigh. It's only one year. And I've got a much easier job at next year's conference. Who knows, I may even get to see a presentation or two...
***

Before getting the apartment today, I went to my orientation at my new job, which starts in March. I'm pretty excited about it. Ill be teaching fourth grade at a bilingual immersion elementary school. Now if I can just get my current director to extend my contract for my two-month vacation, I won't have to go to Japan. She gets back next week. I've been there for over six years, so I'm hoping she'll do a favor for me.
***

Stafford starts his new job on Wednesday, after going to Japan on Monday and Tuesday. He'll be moving next weekend, since the school didn't really plan for him to have the apartment until he started work. Nice. His new job is in Bucheon, so he'll be about an hour away from me-- ironically now that I live in Seoul, we'll be further apart.

Busy Busy Busy

2009-09-24T12:20:00.006+09:00

I can't believe it's been 6 weeks since my last post. And a pretty crap effort that one, as well. I've been busy getting ready for the KOTESOL International Conference, which is mere weeks away, and I'm woefully unprepared for.

I've also been getting the new semester going at work. We've been down two teachers, out of four. So, I've been taking up some of the slack. One of the teachers has arrived, so I've been training him this week. His wife arrives next week, so after I train her up, things should be smooth sailing for the last few months of my contract. That's right, after how many years of saying I was ready for a change, I have given notice, asked for letters of recommendation, and started looking for a new job in earnest.

To that end, I have sent off my criminal background info, which my mother is once again being kind enough to help me get apostilled. I have also procured a Korean criminal background check. Ten years in Korea, and not a single felony. I must be an anomaly among foreign teachers. Oh, wait, it's the Chinese-Koreans that make up the vast majority of foreign criminals. But I digress, the visit to Bundang CSI was awesome.

There is a huge sign, in English, going down the wall, announcing that they are the CSI office. I've seen all three CSI series, so I was expecting large, oddly-lit rooms with super-cool, ultra-high tech machinery. Haha. It had three cubicles, and the only "crime solving equipment" was the ink pad and roller, which the guy had search to find. But he found it, and printed up an English form, cutting into his lunch hour no less, so I have nothing but kind words for the Bundang CSI. :-)

In my extended blogging break, I also went to Mokpo with Staf. I've got some pictures, but I haven't even gone through them yet. Eventually... This is one he took on the ferry that goes around the 1004 islands off the coast there.

I also finished a Leisl sweater for the ultra-talented Ysolda Teague, but I haven't even photographed it yet. I'll see if I can get Staf to take some photos next time he's here.

That's about it. I've been crazy busy, but not with anything particularly blog-worthy. That, and Staf comes by the blog every now and again, so I shouldn't talk about him. :-D

At Least Big Brother is Polite

2009-08-12T19:02:00.003+09:00

How to Teach Etiquette

2009-08-06T12:53:00.002+09:00

I'm at Starbucks, ostensibly writing progress reports, but there is the loudest American here. She has been going on and on about how rude Koreans are. After listening to a diatribe that was in progress when I walked in and continued while I organized my stuff, ordered, received my order, and for a few minutes after that, I finally realized she was teaching a private. When she finally paused for breath, her two students added ways they think ajummas are rude, then she finished up by asking if there was anything else to say about etiquette. I wanted to jump in and say-- how about not yelling about how crap you think the residents of a country are when you are in public in that country?

I live and work in an area where even the ajummas that push fliers in your hand can speak some English. It's not too much of a stretch that the various people in here with their English language dailies and novels are capable of getting the gist of the "lesson" on rude Koreans. I know, venting about the rudeness one deals with in daily life is one of my hobbies, but I try not to speak at 11 in a quiet, public space while doing so.

Slumber Parties: Not Just for Teenagers

2009-07-26T18:16:00.008+09:00

Last night was Jackie's No Boys Allowed Slumber Party in scenic Cheonan. We grilled veggies (some fresh from Jackie's garden), roasted marshmallows, and even shot some fireworks. They are sold a convenience stores here, so are presumably legal.

Jinksy somehow slipped in unnoticed...

Stephanie and I were ready for bed earlier than everybody else, so we stayed at Jinksy's. We had a nice visit this morning before I headed back to the burbs.

The view from Jinksy's apartment. Nice-uh. That's the bonfire pit and the lake in the background.

On the home front, my cat has been getting acquainted with Stafford:

I've been doing a little (very little) knitting, too:

A hat, of course. Small projects are all I seem able to get done these days. This one's for Stafford. I made one for myself first, as a gauge swatch, but I haven't taken a photo of it. Hopefully, I can get a shot that's a little clearer. The pattern is Turn a Square, by the brilliant Brooklyn Tweed.

School's been keeping me pretty busy. This is the last week of regular SAT classes, and the first week of summer camp. So, this week, I'll have eight classes a day, but it'll be back to six per day after that... unless some of the SAT students want one-on-one tutoring. I've let my strong preference against private classes be known, so we'll see.

Overall, the SAT classes are going well. The kids are starting to get a little burnt out. Not that I blame them. The rockheads are starting to get discouraged, because their lackadaisical efforts are raising their scores and the top students are over it, because they are already consistently scoring over 2200, so their scores aren't going up that much. They've been keeping themselves amused, at least. On Friday, one of the students asked to change his name to Sanchez, and another suggested he change it to Dirty Sanchez. I tried not to laugh too openly, you know, since I was the adult in the room, but teachers need amusement, too.

It's Facebook Official

2009-07-12T00:00:00.006+09:00

In case you're wondering, my head has not shrunk, I'm just farther away from the camera.

In semi-related news, I will soon be single, in the legal sense. PBMX told me he would file jointly, but then got himself hospitalized. He has been in the hospital ever since (a month? six weeks?), but he should be getting out this week. He has promised to file the papers this week. Fingers crossed. If I sound unsympathetic, it's only because this has repeated itself so many times.

Update: OK, I wrote this about two weeks ago, but forgot to post it. PBMX is finally out of the hospital, after a week's delay for unspecified reasons. He's now convalescing at home, so I'm still no closer to being divorced...

Life's Like a Box of Chocolates

2009-06-26T21:52:00.009+09:00

I'm swimming in chocolate at the moment. I think it's going to be a good weekend. By "good" of course I mean that I may go into a diabetic coma. :-)

Last night Stafford came over and brought me some swag from John: two cakes of homemade Central American chocolate to be used to make real hot chocolate. Like Water for Chocolate hot chocolate. Mmmmmmm..........

Homemade Chocolate Cakes

As if that weren't enough, tonight, I got home from work and had a birthday package from Aaron waiting for me. A book, a stack of seed packets, a variety of engineering swag, and American junk food! Nice-uh!

Russian Nesting Packages

American Junk Food

Potential Plants

Engineering Swag

Kitty Approved

I can't have plants, because my cat will eat them, but I'm willing to bet that between Joe, Stafford, and Jackie, I can find a loving home for the seeds. Jackie's having a sleepover in a few weeks, so some seeds might be a nice hostess gift. Probably not as nice as liquor, but whatever.

***

Tomorrow I have a ConComm meeting for the KOTESOL international conference. Of course, I am not at all prepared and am pretty much ready to go to bed. Decisions, decisions. Sigh. Obviously, blogging was FAR more important than getting my shit together. Procrastinator to the end... Maybe a Hostess pie will give me some sugar power...

A Little Light Reading

2009-06-23T22:27:00.000+09:00

My students had to read 120 pages for homework tonight. A sample from the prologue:

I could introduce myself properly, but it isn't really necessary. You know me well enough and soon enough, depending on a diverse range of variables. It suffices to say that at some point in time, I will be standing over you, as genially as possible. Your soul will be in my arms. A color will be perched on my shoulder. I will carry you gently away.

At that moment, you will be lying there (I rarely find people standing up). You will be caked in your own body. There might be a discovery; a scream will dribble down in the air. The only sound I'll hear after that will be my own breathing, and the sound of the smell, of my footsteps.

I think some of the prose may be lost in translation. Not to mention that Death is the narrator. Sigh. In the 120 pages, no less than half a dozen German curses are translated into English with helpful usage tips. Seriously. What I would give for books chosen by someone who actually reads. Can't wait for tomorrow's discussion. It should be lively and full of interesting insights. That or blank stares all around. One of the two.

TGIF

2009-06-19T17:54:00.002+09:00

So, at 4:30, my director tells me my final class has been cancelled. I packed my stuff as quickly as I could, and got out of there. :-)

On my way home, I stopped at the bookstore and got some awesome new stickers ("Don't be a chicken shit." "Please...someday a stalker." etc. etc.) and random fobby stationery to send to various people. Thus continuing my good mood. I then made the mistake of stopping in at the super in my building.

It's owned by a couple who are there 13 days out of 14, each taking half the day. I've lived here for five years. They know me. They know me well enough to have conversations with me, such as Korean conversations with me are.

Today, Super Woman (as I think of her) made a big point of letting me know I have a muffin top. She said it (a couple of times), then grabbed her own to make sure I understood. Thanks. I've been here ten years and still don't know exactly what response people are expecting when they give me some "news" like that. "What?! I have a muffin top?! How could this be?! I better run put on some fat burning sweat cream and head to the sauna! I'll only eat green tea-battered chicken fried in olive oil for the next week. It's well-being!" Grrr... Bite me, Super Woman.

Best Birthday Present Update

2009-06-06T20:34:00.004+09:00

Karl arrived in Korea earlier this week, but my boss doesn't recognize that as a reason to miss work, so I just got to see him last night. He, Stafford, and I met at his hotel, where he had booked a meeting room, and we taped a special In the Bag about the changes that he's noticed in Korea in the 15 months (!) since he moved back to Canada. This being Korea, we recorded for over an hour.

He also brought me the much-anticipated T-shirt!!! Stafford took all the photos in this post, because, as usual, I forgot my camera. It is even better than I had thought it would be. :-) The only thing I would do to make it the most perfect shirt ever made would be to add some glitter or rhinestones on the Junior Miss Thug Life lettering. I honestly don't think I'll wear it out of the house, since the image of the naked woman on all fours is pretty big, but I'll love wearing it in the privacy of my home. :-)

After we finished recording, Joe showed up, so we had some dinner (it was about 10 at that point) and all caught up. Joe and I missed the buses/subways out of town, so we had a slumber party at Stafford's house. I can vouch for the fact that he has the least comfortable couch for sleeping in the world-- I lasted four hours and it took my knees an hour or so to regain full feeling. Joe must have had an equally comfy spot on the floor, because he also lasted just four hours before he got up and went home. Looking at the photo, if I'd realized how thin the shirt was, I may not have worn it for pajamas at the slumber party... or at least would have kept my bra on. Well, at least I wasn't wearing a transparent shirt at church. Again.

Hopefully, Karl won't be too busy to get together one more time before he heads out...
***
Yesterday, I made my annual trip to immigration. Usually, it's a blood-pressure raising event that helps me understand people opening fire in a government building. Yesterday, they redeemed themselves.

Okay, so I went on the last day possible, because my school kept forgetting to gather the documents and confirm whether I needed a new criminal record check and/ or drug test (I did not). So, here I am, Friday before SAT classes start and I'll have no time to go.

I needed three documents with my ending date and official school stamp. I did not check these docs before I packed them up to go. One was dated 20 June 2008, one 31 June 2010, and one had the correct day: 31 Dec 2009. The guy looks at the docs, and informs me politely that 2008 has passed and FYI there are only thirty days in June. He didn't even notice the third one, so I just went along with 30 June as the ending date. Someone in the back noticed it, though, so he changed it to the correct day. :-)

Oh, my contract, the one document with the correct date, consists of the school letterhead, the start and end dates, my name and the director's name. The end. I've worked there so long, that's all we do. He was pretty unimpressed, but I just told him that I've been there a long time, so we don't do detailed contracts and they pulled an old document out of my file, so it was outdated, and that was good enough for him. Try that at a US Immigration office...

The Best Birthday Present in the World!

2009-05-25T21:51:00.003+09:00

I can without hyperbole say that this may be the most awesomefulest gift I have ever received in my life. Okay, so I've never been given a kidney, but I've gotten some good gifts before. None like this, though.

After MONTHS of saying how much I needed the image from that article on Korean men and the butt sex made into a T-shirt, Karl has come through in a big way. In less than two weeks, I will be the proud wearer of this:

I may never change clothes again. :-)

The End of May Already?

2009-05-18T13:16:00.002+09:00

I was reading Michelle's blog wondering why it had been so long since she posted, then realized I hadn't posted all month.

It's been a busy month, but I don't really feel like recapping. :-)

If you want to see pictures of Evil Jen and I meeting IRL, go over to ZenKimchi's food journal and scroll down to Cinco de Mayo.

This past Saturday was the annual KOTESOL National Conference. It was in the middle of nowhere, so Seoul chapter provided a bus for members. Stafford and I went down for the day. It was lots of fun. We sat next to different crazy foreigners coming and going, so that was interesting.

I've been feeling kind of ready to move on from my job of late, but I won't be able to get out of my contract, as I had been hoping. Another teacher left at the beginning of the month and another gave notice last week. That's out of four teachers including me. So, I can't leave right now. I'm taking that as a sign that I need to stick to my plan and go home when my contract ends, even though it's not really a good time to be going and looking for work. I suppose I could always work for one of the US branches of my school...

SAT classes start in two weeks, so that will be something different, anyway. Even though they all go to school in the US, so have American teenager attitudes, I like the classes. It's challenging coming up with justifications for crazy English grammar on the fly. :-) It's ten weeks of advanced grammar, so I always learn a lot.

I know there is other stuff going on right now, but it's Monday, so my brain isn't firing on all cylinders yet.

I got an email from my mother this morning letting me know she was out of the hospital and fine, but nobody had told me she was in the hospital. It turns out she broke her ankle in three places and had to get pins and some other metal parts put in her leg and she's in a wheelchair. That must be interesting-- her house is nearly 100 years old and has very narrow hallways and steps at all of the entrances. Not to mention her tub is a claw foot. So, I've got that on my mind, too. Not that there's anything I can do from here...

Is it wrong for me to hope that a lot of my students are away at school camp this week? 'Tis the season, and all.

Why I Don't Teach Privates

2009-04-29T13:40:00.004+09:00

For those of you not on the peninsula, teaching privates is a lucrative sideline which most foreigners do at least occasionally. Basically, you meet with a student and frequently just have an hour-long conversation with them in exchange for $40-50. Sounds good, right? Yet, I haven't done them in years, partly because my free time is worth more than that to me. Mainly, though, I don't like teaching one-on-one. I'm not a big chatter, and neither are students that need to pay someone to speak English to them. You know when talk shows have guests that don't talk? That's what it's like. For an hour.

Unfortunately, for me, my school has a student about to interview for a boarding school overseas. About two months ago, the parents realized he couldn't speak English and now that it's his last four weeks, he's coming to see me ten hours a week. One-on-one. I'm not a miracle worker-- two months of twice weekly lessons has not made him fluent. Now, I've got to get him ready for an interview. Sigh.

Here is a breakdown of our daily two hour session:
About 20-30 minutes of actual work.
Three trips to the bathroom, not during his break.
At least thirty minutes of robot/ machine gun sounds.
My "firmly" reminding him to sit down, about every other minute, sometimes more frequently than that.
Him saying, "I'm not doing that," as each new task is introduced, while simultaneously pretending to fall asleep.

Despite the fact that he has been pulled out of school, he has not had time to do any of his homework yet. So, a fair amount of the precious few productive minutes are spent on work he should have done at home.

The best part? This is at school, so I'm making OT, which is considerably less than private rates.

Other Than Not Being Able to Hear, My Ears are FIne

2009-04-24T13:08:00.002+09:00

Went back to the ear doctor for some tests today-- air pressure, beeps, and speech. My problem is speech, since I can't use the phone on my left side. However, since I'm a foreigner, she used easy vocabulary, which I could easily get since it was one carefully enunciated word at a time. That I can do. Normal conversation, not so much. It's not terrible, but it's gotten noticeable. If it hasn't gotten better in a few weeks, I'll head over to the International Clinic and pay their outrageous foreigner fees.

English Lesson Eavesdropping

2009-04-23T23:32:00.002+09:00

So, I was at Starbucks today eavesdropping on a group of what I assume where nurses teaching themselves patient English. They were having a discussion on the finer points of this statement:
"The patient is nauseous, she might be pregnant." versus "The patient is nauseous, he might be pregnant."

Jenniferteacher Left the Batcave, and Why Aren't Grown Men as Interested in My Boobs as Seven-Year-Old Boys?

2009-04-20T22:17:00.012+09:00

At the KOTESOL conference last month, I saw Stephanie, but was too busy with KOTESOL-y duties that I didn't have time to chat. So, I suggested we get together for some girlie fun. And, in a surprising turn of events, I actually got together with her. :-) Not that I take the Hermit Kingdom as an order rather than a description, or anything...

Some of her former co-workers at Hoseo in Cheonan-Asan were having a bonfire/ slumber party. We went and drank many tequila smoothies and made smores. I can now say that HobNobs are very thick, but otherwise perfect for smores. And they have Nob in the title. Not that I am juvenile enough to make jokes about eating a 'Nob, of course. Well, maybe just once or twice...

Jinksy tastefully removed his hand from Stephanie's boob for the camera.

Unsurprisingly, I did not stay for the slumber party portion of festivities. A little togetherness goes a long way with me. So, Steph and I hitched a ride WAY back to town (Hoseo has a beautiful campus, in the middle of nowhere) and stayed at a yogwan. We really slept in-- I still can't believe we didn't get a "courtesy" get-the-hell-out wake up call. We hung out and talked for a few hours before she went to a wedding (in jeans and a T-shirt-- Korean weddings rule!) and I trudged back home.
***

There was a fan at the bonfire! Actually, Jackie was the host. She will probably be on the podcast in the future, assuming she still wants to once the soju wears off...

Jackie, SeoulPodcast fan and bonfire host extraordinaire, and two people that don't listen to the podcast. :-)

Houston eating something that apparently required chopsticks and tongs.Smores!A little post-prandial refresher. I used to get teased mercilessly for the mid-party nap, so I'm glad to see it's become more acceptable. :-)

I think I may need to start actually listening to the podcast. I listened to a couple of episodes recently, but I wasn't on one of them and the other one I wanted to hear what the guest had to say. But I digress. One of the first things Jackie said to me was that she would know my laugh anywhere. Which is how Joe recognized Karl and I the first time he joined us on Seoul Survivor.

So, now I'm wondering what kind of hyena-woman I sound like on the show. I will freely admit that I go through life being inordinately amused by minor things, but most of the time I can hide behind the "crazy foreigner" flag. One of the many benefits of life in a foreign land...
***

I got an elliptical trainer last week, but D batteries are proving more elusive that one would think. The search continues... Now, when my pianist neighbor practices for a recital in the wee hours, I'll have some way to occupy my time other than plot her death/ loss of fingers.
***

Once again, a handful of my very young male students are fixated on my boobs. A week or two ago, one in particular decided that the best way to interact with me is to stick his face between my boobs and then turn his face left and right. To do this, he has to ignore me pulling his arms or pushing his shoulders away, as I try to head him off at the pass, so to speak. But he is determined, definitely not a quitter. Today, he got up three times during a test, ran up and shoved his face at my chest, like he just had to be fast enough and I wouldn't catch on. While I admire his tenacity in the face of constant obstruction, I wish it would sink in that it's inappropriate. If only I could find a grown man as interested in my boobies...

Happy Black Day!

2009-04-14T23:46:00.003+09:00

Yes, here we are on the lamest of the Valentine's Day triple-shot. For those of you not on the peninsula, White Day is 14 March, the day for guys to give girls gifts. Today is the day for singletons to eat noodles in a black bean sauce and lament their sorry lot in life.

I chose not to partake for several reasons. First, I'm not really into Valentine's Day, even when I'm in a relationship, so a second-rate knock off doesn't really interest me. Second, jjajangmyun is not overly delicious. Third, I don't require a special day to complain about being single, I do that everyday. :-)

Here a Ricetard, There a Ricetard, Everywhere a Ricetard

2009-04-06T23:58:00.003+09:00

Mission accomplished!
***

I've actually done some knitting this week. At Stitch n Bitch yesterday, I made this:

I'm attempting grafting for the first time. I've failed twice so far, and if the third isn't the charm, I'll just do a lame three-needle bind off. It the Tychus pattern from Knitty, which I made in LSU purple and gold for my sister last year. It's a quick knit-- all short rows. I usually don't knit anything twice, but the recipient chose the pattern.

I'm making this one for Aaron, perhaps my oldest podcast fan. Perhaps my only podcast fan... I think he's gotten tired of hearing me moan and complain about my date-free existence. At any rate, he's decided to both help me be less of a social retard and take math out of my axis of evil. The least I could do was make him a hat. And apparently, the most. :-)

KOTESOL conference done and etc.

2009-03-29T11:06:00.003+09:00

Yesterday was the annual Seoul chapter conference and election. We had planned for 1-200 and had 4-500 show up. Apparently, free entry and lunch are a bigger draw than we realized... We also had a great line up of presentations, so that could have been part of the appeal. :-)

We also had our elections. No surprises there. As usual, everyone ran unopposed. It seems working for free in your off-time is not as popular as it once was. So, I'm 1st VP for another year. Yay, me. :-) I'll also be filling in as Secretary until we find a new one, since the previous one became 2nd VP and will also be filling in as newsletter editor until we get a new one of those... etc etc etc. The main thing is that we are finally rid of the outgoing president who didn't seem to understand that he was not just a figurehead. The one good thing about his presence was that he caused the rest of us to pull together to do our best in spite of him.
***

Earlier in the week, The Seoul Podcast turned one! We didn't have a guest or show notes. We decided to just talk about our personal highs and lows of the podcast's first year. Joe was worried that we wouldn't have enough to say. As if. I'm only quiet with people I don't know. Everyone else gets their ears talked off. Joe and Stafford also have the gift of the gab. So, we ended up recording for three hours. No news. No Things That Make You Go Whaa... No Time Wasters. Just free-talking, as it's called here on the peninsula.

I'm assuming Joe cut out quite a bit, because he was planning to add in an extended clip segment. If that sounds good to you, you can listen to it here. :-) I haven't listened to it myself, of course. I could say yet, but I rarely listen to the show-- I'd rather remember myself as being witty and don't want to face evidence to the contrary... I also don't particularly like the sound of my own voice. I can get a little screechy when I'm excited. I think Joe finally talked me through the adjustments I needed to make to keep my mike from cutting out at particularly screechy moments. It only took a year... :-) Maybe I should take computers out of my axis of evil...
***

Other than that, life's been pretty quiet on the homestead. I got the marriage license from PBMX about ten days ago, but I haven't been organized enough to get out of the house early enough to get to the bank before work. Getting foreign funds requires the patience of Job and forms signed in blood, and anomolies, such as wanting funds in AU dollars, can cause the teller to exhibit signs of nervous breakdown. I used to have a teller that knew me and knew that I sometimes got US checks and sometimes got AU checks, but she is gone. (She once confided that we were the same age, so she might have been retired.) So, now I have to deal with the cute young girls that are only used to electronic transfers. As long as they are cute...

Anyway, it will get done. I found out about a Korean school that's at the same subway stop as the bank, so I'll probably do it tomorrow when I go take a level test. If I get up in time...
***

I've decided that I've been far too lazy this semester. In order to prevent a teacher being laid off, I voluntarily cut my hours 20%. I still make more than them and I'm not paying off student loans at the current (horrifying) exchange rate, so I don't mind. Actually, I'm kind of bitter that when one teacher leaves in May, she won't be replaced and my full hours will be scheduled.

But I digress. My plan was to spend those extra hours getting things done, like work out, read books that aren't for school, knit, you get the idea. I haven't. I've been completely unproductive for the eight weeks since the semester began.

So, I'm going to check out the Korean school and I'm going to take a math class through LSU, if I can find a local test proctor. I've decided to take math out of my axis of evil this year.
***
My apathy hasn't limited itself to home, either. I've been so unmotivated at work the past week or so. I just feel ready for a change and am tired of seeing the same faces. Some of my students I've had for years now. There are a few I would happily put in my pocket and bring home, but not all of them...

Most of the students have been driving me crazy lately. I think their parents are pumping them full of Red Bull before class. At any rate, there has been far too much singing, dancing, splits, high kicks, and loud-talking for me to be a happy woman. On the other hand, one student spanked himself in class the other day, I mean with the finesse of a stripper-- he slowly swung his butt to the side and then smacked himself. Over and over. I almost had a stroke trying to hold in the laughter, especially since he was doing it as an act of contrition when he realized how pissed I was at him for all the annoying crap he had been doing just before that.

Happy White Day!

2009-03-14T19:03:00.006+09:00

Today is White Day, part of an ingenious bit of marketing which has turned Valentine's Day in Korea into a three month extravaganza of chocolates and plush toys. On Valentine's Day, girls give gifts to boys. On White Day, boys give gifts to girls. On Black Day, April 14, singletons eat Jjajangmyeon, the Korean "Chinese" dish of thick noodles in a black bean paste sauce. It's not as gross as it sounds, but not something I ever go out looking to eat, either.

In honor of White Day, I took these photos today in Seoul. All three shops are in the Jongak Station underground shopping arcade at the end of Insa-dong. In case you want to surprise your honey with some sexy drawers. If I had a boyfriend, I could only hope he would get me the set with the pantaloons. Nothing says sexy like a man in pastel underwear and a woman in pantaloons. Notice all the options for the last set, it's like a six-piece set. One could mix and match to keep things new and interesting... :-)

I would like to go on permanent record as saying if I ever fall for a man that wants us to wear couple panties, shoot me. Ditto if he thinks pantaloons are hot.

In case you're wondering, all male underwear manikins are wearing cups, or maybe they're just happy to see us.

Teacher, what do you call the stuff Daddy's drink when they are angry?

2009-03-13T23:59:00.002+09:00

One of my sweetest, cutest students asked me this today. I would have thought it was funny, but she has imitated "what daddies look like when they come home late" on more than one occasion.

I'm a Survivor! (cue music)

2009-02-23T23:57:00.002+09:00

Yes, I have survived an entire week without the internet at home. In the process, I suffered excruciating withdrawal symptoms and discovered there are about four or five more hours in a day than I realized. :-) Now, it's back to business as usual, of course, and there are no longer enough hours in the day.
***

Computer gremlins were not the worst thing about last week, unfortunately. Mr. PBMX drama continues ad nauseum. In his bid to show me when I asked him to procure a copy of our marriage license, he got himself hospitalized and lost his apartment and was homeless for a few days. Apparently, his mother is trying to divorce him as well. Or else, sleeping on the street was preferable to spending time with her. She's a pretty miserable bitch, but I think I could suck it up in those circumstances.

So, I am now waiting with baited breath to see if he will actually send me the paperwork (which he claims he has in his possession) so that I can finalize our divorce. I hoping to keep our separation under three years, if possible. I dream big.

Karl is helping me to keep it all in perspective-- I've never been hospitalized against my will, therefore, my life is pretty good. :-)
***

I have a new bon mot from school: a summary of a book apparently involving Nate the Great and a drug dealer. :-) I'll try to get it posted in the next few days.

The Catcher in the Rye, not middle school reading

2009-02-09T11:28:00.003+09:00

Once again, my admin's lack of reading has had interesting consequences for me. Last semester, I had to deal with the relatively minor issue of explaining how an unmarried woman could be a mother. You may recall that I got out of that one when the students decided it was a miracle. Romeo and Juliet of course uses poetic language and euphemisms that I could glide right past...

This time, I may not get off so easily. The Powers That Be have determined that my middle schoolers need to read The Catcher in the Rye. Sigh. Clearly, they have never read the book or even a review of it. On the upside, I'll definitely know who did their reading this weekend. The ones that DON'T have questions about why the woman took off her clothes in Holden's hotel room and then a guy beat up Holden to get ten dollars for the woman, what horny means, and why was Holden so upset that the girl he knew sat in a car with his roommate, etc etc will be a dead giveaway... Sigh. I'm warming up my jazz hands as I write this.

I understand that not everyone likes to read as much as I do, even if I can't always see my way to dating them :-) , but there is really no excuse for not at least reading reviews before assigning it to students. Barring that, open the book to page one, which has no less that four curse words. One would think after the Kurt Vonnegut Incident a couple of years ago, things might have changed...

Mr. Please-Be-My-X, Thy Name is Predictable (in addition to PBMX, of course)

2009-01-30T01:06:00.002+09:00

So, it turns out that I cannot get a divorce without a copy of my marriage license. Simple enough for the average person, right? Well, since my separation, I've been trying to overcome my general pack-rat-iness by culling through literally every single thing I own every three or four months. Can you see where this is going? I've looked everywhere, which in my tiny apartment is not that many places, and it is not here. So, I finally realized I was just going to have to pay the $50 and get a copy.

Unfortunately, I did not get Australian citizenship during my marriage, and without an Australian passport to prove my identity, I can't get a copy of my own marriage license. So, I was forced to contact Mr. PBMX and send him the money to do it. In what has become his typical form over the 27 (!) months since our separation, he did something to himself which lead to hospitalization.

To one-up himself, this time he got evicted "because he was in the hospital" which I am taking to mean he didn't pay his rent, which was probably overdue, since he was only in the hospital for three days. So now he is apparently homeless. He lives in a country with national health care, so these all-too-frequent hospital stays are free, not to mention in a country with dole benefits generous enough to actually live on, and he still can't take care of himself. Sometimes I wonder what he did with the man I married.

My Students Never Fail to Amuse and I Never Fail to Not Have My Camera When They are Amusing

2009-01-20T23:42:00.003+09:00

One of my first graders came in today wearing a fur-lined leather poncho (from India, of all places that don't really need fur-lined leather winter wear). Another girl immediately ran up to her, lifted the poncho, and stuck her face on the fur and rubbed away, mid-chest level. As I debated whether I should just let kids be kids or if I should stop one from sexually harrassing the other, the boys started shouting, "Cony's feeding Ahyun milk!" Over and over. Loudly. I just hope there are no parental phone calls requiring me to explain what happened in class.

Happy New Year!

2009-01-11T18:31:00.005+09:00

I can't believe it's already mid-month! As usual "intensive" classes, held when students are ostensibly on holiday, are jam-packed with educational goodness. As a result, I've got a few bon mots from my sweet students. Here are some of my favorites:

Other than school, I've had a veritable flurry of brief visits. Week before last, my mother was here for a long weekend and today I had lunch with my step-father. He works for Delta, so he's here for work. Mama was here for me. :-) I was working, so we didn't get to do much, but it was still great to see her. My summer visit was cut short by the hurricane, as you may recall. I could link the post from September, but I probably won't.
***

School is going well, considering the academic director got married yesterday. No major lapses in planning or fore-thought. A minor miracle here on the peninsula. I finished with my SAT classes, so I no longer have to think up rationalizations for the minutiae of English grammar on the fly.

Next week, I get to fast forward through a nude scene in the movie my middle school class is watching. It's a class of boys, so I'm already snickering that they aren't going to get to see the one part of the movie that would be interesting to them. Remember the films you watched in school? Wouldn't a little nudity have made them more fun and interesting? Yeah.
***
My legs are dying at the moment. I've actually been sticking to my resolutions. No, not the one to randomly blackmail people that I put on my facebook page. My real resolutions: cut out processed foods and exercise. So far, I've learned that green smoothies are delicious, even if they look and sound vile; I've lost 3kg (yes, a sign of how far I have to go); and I've realized exactly how out of shape I had gotten. When I say it hurts to use stairs, I mean, up or down, three steps or three flights, I want to grimace in pain. By "want" of course, I mean that I probably am. Fortunately, I'm a foreigner, therefore, crazy. :-)
***
I have actually been knitting, but I don't have any good photos. A few weeks ago, I finished a February Lady Sweater in a lovely green. I finally got the buttons on after Mama left, but I still haven't worn it in public. Maybe to next weeks' SnB... I'm about 1/3 of the way finished with a Henley-style sweater (not from a pattern) in an eggplanty color. Aubergine, if you prefer. Dongdaemun was having a great sale on yarn, so I bought enough to make sweaters in four colors, including these two. :-) Now, I just have to make them. And finish them. And put buttons on them. And wear them in public.

What all the kids are hoping to see in their stockings this Christmas

2008-12-23T23:39:00.005+09:00

Merry Christmas! Enjoy something more delicious than spinach wafers and pumpkin cookies.

I'm Also a Culture Teacher...

2008-12-09T22:25:00.003+09:00

As a (hopefully) good teacher, I try not to let on when I'm feeling crabby or when my students are driving me insane. However, my perception and reality are not always one and the same. All of my students seem to have consumed several gallons of Red Bull immediately before any class with me this week, and it is grating on me. I hadn't realized how irritated I was, until one of my students started looking like she was possessed-- staring straight ahead with only the whites of her eyes showing. I asked what was wrong and she said she was trying to make her eyes look like mine. Apparently, I had been rolling my eyes with such abandon, that she thought I was purposefully trying to look like I was having a seizure of some kind.

Korean Kids Really ARE More Innocent

2008-11-24T23:31:00.002+09:00

I've been reading Walk Two Moons with my 6th grade reading class and today our discussion included the revelation of a character's mother having had a child before marriage whom she gave up. My students were VERY puzzled and kept asking in different ways trying to confirm that she in fact had not been married and yet had had a child. Finally, in Korean, one of the kids opined that it was a miracle. The book has a number of unusual plot twists, so apparently, a virgin birth required no more suspension of disbelief than, say, the main character's mother dying in a wreck (which had also been revealed in the portion we discussed today). Fortunately, the virgin birth scenario seemed no less plausible to them than the rest of the story and I was able to put away my jazz hands. :-)

A Happy Foreigner in Korea

2008-11-20T00:42:00.002+09:00

God Bless America! :-)

To Be a Cat Lady or Not To Be a Cat Lady

2008-11-16T22:46:00.004+09:00

A couple of years ago, I discovered a baby yarn that looks like terry cloth. Of course, not in Korea, just online. Since it was not locally available, naturally, I lusted after that yarn in an unnatural way. The only thing that stopped me from ordering a sweater's worth (as in, adult sweater, for me) was that it was only available in hideous baby pastels.

Then, last weekend, at Dongdaemun, I saw something even better. What could be better than terry cloth yarn, you ask? Mink blanket yarn! It looks like gigantic pipe cleaner yarn, but feels like a mink blanket. And! It was available in a purple/ lavender/ white variegated colorway. I snapped up a sweater's worth without even asking the price (so, undoubtedly got the foreigner/ rube "special"). Well, it IS NaNoSweMo, right? Right. and if it's knit on 10mm needles, I can get it done in a month. Or a weekend. Whichever.

I will not take a photo, because it is a sweater which screams, "THIS IS WORN BY A DIVORCED CAT LADY!" I will say that it is an over-sized cardi and it took me about 10 hours to knit. My kind of sweater.

In addition to my sweater success (I thought I would run out of yarn, but I finished with about 1/2 a row's worth left over), my weekend was full of surprises. One of which was unexpectedly having a favor for a friend turn into 350K with a promise of future paydays. :-) A little something to offset the won's swan dive. I also used Korean today and... actually had a conversation. About politics. Okay,the guy obviously was experienced with foreigner Korean, but still...

AND I put off the church lady that has decided to be my friend, at least for another week...

I'm Ready to Have Something on the Needles

2008-11-03T23:15:00.010+09:00

I haven't had anything on the needles in a few weeks, since I finished this:

Like the error right there in the middle? It's my nod to the Amish. ;-) I know you are also in awe of my ghetto lace blocking style. It works, though. This scarf was super-easy. It's just two repeats of the tilting blocks stitch pattern. I did around 30 repeats. The yarn is Filatura di Crossa, I can't remember the colorway, but it's a nice autumnal blend of rusts and olive-y greens. It's for my mom, as soon as I get it in the mail...
***

We had another contest on the SeoulPodcast, and here was the grand prize:

Not one, but two earpickers, an Englice dictionary, a "V-line" face massager, Korean stickers, some socks with gambling card images on them, and some random Korean candies.

***

We had Halloween at work this week. I forgot to take my camera one day, but here are a few kids from Wednesday.

***

I went to Yuldong Park to check out the foliage this past weekend. It was definitely not a date. :-( It was fun, anyway.

If you look closely, you can see that the bungee jump faces a huge church (above and slightly to the left of my head).

Don't know what it is? Me, either.

Even the port-a-potties are nice. :-)

I'm Done!!! And I hate Word

2008-10-24T01:41:00.002+09:00

So, here it is, after 1 AM, and I'm putting the final finishing touches on my final paper, which is not stellar work, but enough to get me through the course, when the file DISAPPEARS from my drive and Word is refusing to open the file, because it is not a valid path. I hate Word! I am forever a convert to Open Office, since it had no trouble finding the file on my thumb drive. Now I don't have to throw myself at the mercy of my instructor, who I have already determined to be a hardass and unlikely to be too sympathetic that I had a problem at the 11th hour due to my extreme ability to procrastinate.

Why I wish I were Karl

2008-10-23T18:04:00.003+09:00

On my way to school today, I saw an awesome example of mutton dressed as lamb- a Korean specialty if there ever was one. This woman was, shall we say, of a certain age (I'll generously guess mid-fifties) wearing skintight leopard skin pants and platform stilettos at least five inches high. I had my camera, but not the balls to take a photo on a crowded pedestrian mall. Karl would never have let bystanders put him off. I'm pretty sure he would have walked across broken glass to get a photo of her.

***
For those keeping track, I finish my MEd. tomorrow. I have a manageable-ish amount of work to get done before school tomorrow. It's far from my finest, but it's enough for me to pass. Unless my teacher is stricter with the grading than last semester. I could link to my previous complaint about him, but I shouldn't even be spending this time writing this down. My ace procrastination skills have limits...

A Good Time Was Had By... Me or The One Where Chandler Dates Rachel's Boss

2008-10-03T21:08:00.006+09:00

I may have just gotten a little karmic retribution for snubbing Soldierman so cavalierly for his...um... intellectual deficiencies in the form of a rather brutal dating experience tonight.

Well, as you may have guessed from the title, *I* had a great time. To quote Rachel's boss, "Click, click, click." He's smart, funny, and articulate. ;-) We talked for hours and the clicking *seemed* to be mutual.

Until it was time to go and he gave me a one-armed, sideways hug and said..."We'll have to keep in touch."

Ouch.

So, I'm going to try not to dissect the evening and figure out where it all went wrong. But I probably will.

On a more positive note, I got an email from Please-Be-My-X and he is NOT coming back to Korea at this time.

Another Reason Not to Use Make Up Testers

2008-09-28T17:28:00.002+09:00

While at COEX grading papers and stocking up on The Face Shop's cheap toiletries today, I witnessed one of the grosser events that I have seen in recent memory. While a young mother was putting every single lipstick on her mouth, her son repeatedly sneezed all over the testers. I mean, all over. I guess she figured she lived in the house with him, so she was already exposed. Or mothers don't mind their kid's bodily fluids. Or she's a Korean mom and, therefore, oblivous to her child's actions.

At any rate, I will no longer even be putting testers on the back of my hand-- I *do* mind kid's bodily fluids.

When Matter Meets Anti-Matter (or not)

2008-09-18T11:45:00.004+09:00

Last night, both guests (Stafford and a comedian) backed out at the last minute. Okay, the comedian had been admitted to the hospital... Stafford's excuse was...um... I don't remember. Joe knew how sad I was to have missed the chance to meet Evil Jennifer, so he surprised me by having her on. A good time was had by all. Or by me, anyway. You'll have to listen yourself to this week's episode-- due out Saturday. I know, I know, that's three days away. Try to hold your horses. :-)

***

Getting back to work has been fine-ish. The days still seem much longer than they should. I've got a good bunch of kids and the new teacher is actually a teacher, so she has not had any problems so far. Even better, her college roommate may be coming to work with us from next month, so I won't have to force myself to be sociable.

***

Last week, I missed out on discussing this topic on the podcast, but I revisited it this week. Now all I need is a T-shirt with this on it:

Home Again Home Again Jiggety-Jig

2008-09-12T14:17:00.006+09:00

Well, I made it through the rest of my visit without any more hurricanes.

I decided to pony up another $130 (it was already the most expensive coach ticket ever, so why not?) for the extra 5" of leg room. I know, if anyone doesn't need extra leg room, it's me, but I figured not too many families would pay that for their kids, and I was right! I had a window seat and no one next to me for the entire flight (three planes)-- money well spent.

I missed getting my cat out of jail last night by about ten minutes, so I was there at opening this morning to spring him. He was totally freaked out and jumped out of my arms on the way home and hid in the bushes. I finally had to pull him out by the leash (he has the kind that wraps around his chest-- I wasn't going to choke him, so don't send me nasty emails.)

Now I've got to try to get my cable hooked up today or (gasp!) I won't have TV for the long weekend. For the past four years I've gotten free cable, but my apartment has discontinued that service. I imagine that has something to do with the ajumas that put together a petition to lower our monthly bills, which are already pretty low. Thanks for saving me that $3, ladies.

ETA- Reason Korea is great #33: I called the cable company at 12:00 and the cable guy just left (5:15).

I guess I should unpack. Or take a nap and then unpack... I just hope I didn't miss this while I was gone:

(Thanks to Brian for the head's up and the link to I lobe Konglish.)

It Wouldn't Be Home Without a Hurricane

2008-09-02T10:32:00.003+09:00

Gustav has now pretty much come and gone with little damage to my family members and their homes but now I'm stuck in Tampa, because the airport will still be closed when I was supposed to fly back to NO. I rescheduled the flight and was happy to get on one, but my sister is pissed because the traffic's going to be bad. She wanted me to reschedule it for Saturday-- the day of the opening game between the Saints and... Tampa. Whatever. I guess it wouldn't be a trip home if she wasn't pissed off at me about something...

If it's Thursday, it must be Disney World :-)

2008-08-28T06:23:00.002+09:00

Why don't work weeks go by this quickly? Needless to say, I'm having a great time and doing a lot of relaxing and not a lot of homework...

I've been home for a week now and am already at destination #2-- my Dad's in Florida. Tomorrow we are going to Epcot. Apparently there is a new ride that simulates a hurricane-- is that really necessary in these parts?

World's Meanest Mom

2008-08-19T08:19:00.002+09:00

That's how I felt when I took my cat, kicking and screaming every step of the way, to the vet, which, fortunately for me, was two blocks from my house. May I just say, that was the longest two blocks of my life. I did at least get some enjoyment from seeing how much he freaked out all of the Koreans we passed. :-) Watch out he might steal your soul! Actually, the sounds he was making did fit a soul-sucking demon...

When I got to the vet, there was a bit of a Korean moment, of course. Last week, I talked to the vet, made a reservation, if you will, to make sure they could take care of him for three weeks. I was quoted 300k, which was what I had expected. No problem. When he saw my "big cat" the price changed to 375. What, are they going to feed him more? I will just have to trust that the higher fee went to getting him a larger cage. I will also have to trust that they will let him out to exercise each day. I had to hit up the ATM, since I had been told 300, and when I came back, Kneivel was out of sight and silent. So, I am also trusting that they didn't drug him up to keep him quiet.

Koreans Can be White Trash, Too

2008-08-17T22:03:00.003+09:00

While I was grocery shopping today, I saw a store employee doing inventory. No big deal, except he came across an open bottle of wine. Yes, some thirsty shopper uncorked a bottle of wine in the store and had a little drink. Were they carrying a corkscrew around with them? How did they do this surreptitiously, anyway?

***

I was finally able to get a ticket from New Orleans to Tampa with my inferior Korean credit card. Well, actually, I used Paypal. I heart Southwest. And Paypal.

Dear Sallie Mae, Please Pull Your head Out of Your Ass. Thanks, Jen

2008-08-16T23:09:00.002+09:00

Around the beginning of the year, as you may recall, I paid off a student loan more befitting a doctor/ Harvard grad than a teacher/ state school grad. As you can imagine, I did a few happy dances and then forgot about it. Until today. When I got a nicely worded note letting me know that I was going to default on my loans. After I gave the nice (but clearly uninterested) customer service rep a piece of my mind, I was informed that I had not paid $300. Let me just back up and say that I called my student loan people and confirmed that everything was paid and they happily announced that I was debt free. How, I would like to know, can I pay money that I don't know is owed? The nice (but clearly uninterested) customer service rep insisted they had informed me and gave me the address they had been sending mail to, where I lived in 1996. Did they lose the five (six? ten?) addresses I've had since then? I would understand this if it were still state-run-- government workers aren't really known for getting off their asses for much of anything but a break, but Sallie Mae has been privatized. So, theoretically, this is a profit-seeking corporation. Were they hoping to cash in on the massive interest that has accrued to make a total of $300?

Out of the Mouths of Babes...Or Reason Korea is Not Great #1

2008-08-13T16:49:00.009+09:00

As long as I have been here, I still am occasionally stopped in my tracks by my students' offhand remarks. Or writing.

Yesterday, I was given two college application essays to review for a student. Let me repeat: college application essays. You know, the ones that make you stand out as the perfect freshman that the school absolutely must accept. OK, just wanted to make that clear.

The topic of both essays was something along the lines of "Discuss some hardship you have overcome." Essay #1 was all about the "hardship" of sharing a room at boarding school with a girl that had multiple airplanes and homes around the world. The hardship? The roommate was messy. Really. Space devoted to said hardship and its resolution? One paragraph. Space devoted to telling about the girl's wealth? Three paragraphs. She actually said that their difference in socio-economic status was a cultural difference they had to deal with. You know, as opposed to the cultural difference of coming from different cultures. Which, BTW, she did not mention.

So, the first essay was basically crap. No problem, I thought, she has a second essay with basically the same topic. If necessary, she can revise the second one and use it for both schools. Then I read the second one. This one was about the hardship of staying with a black family for a fortnight in England. It was a hardship because of the stink of their weird food throughout the house. However, she found their hair very interesting to look at, even after she got used to the strange smells. Now, she proudly announced, she tells her friends that black people aren't scary and dirty. Really. I read the entire thing thinking it had to be a joke-- this girl lives in the US. But, no, no joke. So, I edited the grammar and vocab and put a nicely worded note suggesting she revise the overtly racist parts, without specifically stating that she would only be left with an introduction.

So Close I Can Taste It

2008-08-11T19:07:00.006+09:00

One week from now, I will be getting on a plane for home. My first visit to BR in four years. I've only got a few classes this week, so I've got to do some shopping, packing, and arrange the kennel for my cat.

I'm not looking forward to that last one-- it took him a while to forgive me for the last time and that place had a huge cat area with floor to ceiling condos and room to run. Of course this is Korea, so that place is gone, so it looks like he's going to spend three weeks in a cage.

***

SAT classes mostly ended last week, which is why I have so few hours this week. They ended much better than I expected except for a few of my private tutors. My tutoring sessions weren't as popular as the ones with the young teachers that spent equal time chatting and teaching. I'll try not to take it personally. ;-) Now I have no excuse not to work on my CALL coursework and a couple other papers I've got ( long over-) due.

***

Well, while the soldier has been in the field for two weeks I have had plenty of time to "reflect" (obsess is such an ugly word) on things. I've decided not to see him any more. As nice as he is, I want to meet someone that I don't have to modify my vocabulary for, I do that all day at school. It's not like I'm some super-intellectual person, so I don't think that's unreasonable. I think things were really over when he was shocked to hear that I was (gasp!) reading one night when he called. Having two weeks to fixate on it sealed his fate. Onward and upward. :-)

***

I got some unhappily surprising news at work on Friday. Just last month, I signed a long contract in order to get this vacation and another month off in January. I did it not only to get the time off, but also because there are some developments going on at my school that, if they come to fruition, would be an excellent opportunity for me. Then, out of the blue, on Friday, one of my bosses (the one spearheading the project) announced that she and her (horrible, wretched) ex have reconciled and are talking about getting married in spring, but she wants to get married be the end of the year. After they get married, she is going to move to the US so he can go to dentistry school. Her plan when I met her was to become a dentist, BTW, but now she wants to be a wife. Only. I have to say, I'm really not pleased with this turn of events-- surely she knew this was a possibility last month. In fact, I may not finish my contract if she leaves.

I Haven't Fallen off the Face of the Planet

2008-07-27T12:20:00.002+09:00

I've just been busy. Friday was the end of the regular semester. I had foolishly thought that the next few weeks before I go home would be relaxed. Well, it will be slower than the past six weeks, but I'll still be teaching about 35 classes a week.

Since I'm going home when SAT classes finish, I was not scheduled to teach children's classes for the summer. I thought that meant I would be teaching 9-1 for the next three weeks. I was half-right-- I'm teaching 9-1. And 2-6. Mondays, at least, are half-days. I suppose I'll be happy on payday, because I'm working August on an hourly basis. That will make up for the most expensive cattle class airline ticket in history.

***

Other than teaching, I've just started my final course for my MEd!!!! Hold your applause, hold your applause. Yes, this course I began a mere five and half years ago, it coming to a conclusion only 6 months past the technical deadline. Go waivers!

***

I haven't written about my personal life in a while, so here's an update. Things are fairly quiet on the Please-Be-My-X front. Right after I sent him home for the third time (but who's counting), he was emailing me on his usual stalker-esque schedule. It has petered out, though. He managed to get a job and hold it for an entire week before he sabotaged himself. When he complained to me about his mom's lack of understanding (he's squatting at her place), I told him pretty straight up that he does the same thing over and over and over, knowing what the result has been the previous umpteenth times. So, it is his fault for thinking things would be different this time. Since then, there has been near radio silence. I may even send him divorce papers soon...

I also started seeing someone about a month ago. He's really sweet and seems eager to prove that he is NOT like P-B-M-X. He's a soldier stationed about 1 1/2 hours away, so that's a little inconvenient, but we're taking turns going to see each other, so... so far so good. I have to say, it's weird to go out and have someone else pay. Good weird. :-) He's going to the field for some extended training this week and when he gets back, I'm going home, so that kind of sucks, but I'm sure I'll survive... ;-)

I'm in Wikipedia

2008-07-16T23:25:00.002+09:00

Check it out.

Also check out cheerleaders at the 7th Wheelchair Sports Tournament doing a dance inspired by Japanese horror movies. Some things just don't translate well...

I got my name in the paper today

2008-07-09T20:14:00.000+09:00

Check it out here.

Castus Interuptus

2008-07-03T22:47:00.002+09:00

There will be no new podcast this week, but not for lack of trying. Last night, we talked to Annalog for exactly two hours and twenty-five minutes before Joe realized that the record button had not actually engaged when he had clicked it. In his defense, I hadn't noticed either-- there is a voice prompt and a warning from Skype that the call is being recorded, neither of which occurred last night.

Since it was already well past my bedtime, we decided not to have a new episode this week and to have her come back in September.

***

I received my grade for the only project that I had to do for the CALL class I was taking-- not what I was expecting. I'm pretty pissed, because I put a lot of effort into it and the comments are kind of ...um... nit-picky. Now I can only hope that my online participation grade will boost my overall grade. I put so much work into this class-- way more than I would have if it were a traditional classroom setting, so getting this grade has put me in a crappy mood.

I had heard ages ago that this particular instructor is a hard ass, so I'm going to go with that, rather than think my research/ writing is sub-par. ;-)

***

My SAT classes are going well. The kids are pretty good, behavior-wise, considering that most of them live in the US and that this is their vacation. They spend four hours a day getting filled with exam-y goodness and then go home to do about six hours of homework, five days a week. I can honestly say that I would not have given it my all had I been put in their shoes.

I've only got six more working days with 11 classes(MWF I *only* have 8 per day). Yea! At the end of the month, my regular classes will finish for the month and then I'll only have SAT classes. Then, when those finish, it's off to sunny LA (Louisiana, that is) for almost a month.

Estonian Potpourii

2008-06-25T20:27:00.001+09:00

Estonian Potpourii
Originally uploaded by crazylacelady

Estonian Potpouri-- I've got the center block of one square plus the first pattern done-- 25 lace patterns to go. ;-)

A Month?!

2008-06-25T19:56:00.002+09:00

I had no idea it had been so long since I last posted.

Well, I haven't had anything exciting going on, so I guess there was nothing to post about. I was too busy finishing the semester (the penultimate course for my master's!) to knit or anything else, really.

At school, I'm teaching SAT classes from 9-1 and then my usual schedule (2:30-8:30), so I still don't have much of a life even though I finished the class I was taking.

After much leg work on my mother's part, I was able to secure a criminal background check for my visa renewal. Since I haven't lived there since 1991, I'm sure no other place in the world would consider that a valid check, but I'm not anywhere else, I'm in Korea. I also got my medical, which was the usual fun of a Korean doctor's office.

So, I'm sitting in the (full) waiting room while the nurse tries to figure out exactly which drugs I'm supposed to be tested for, when she realizes she's forgotten an important question. Rather than call or motion me over, she shouts, "Ms. Jennifer, Ms. Jennifer, are you having your period?"

There is an older woman there who is afraid something might get lost in translation, so she starts calling out possible English translations (she never did get it right), while the other nurse starts calling out all the Korean euphemisms I am likely to have heard before. Nurse #1 later realized she had forgotten another important question, so we replayed the scene, replacing "chronic illness" and "medications" for "period."

I then got to give the crowd (okay, about seven or eight people) a thrill when they got to see me get weighed. Koreans are always very curious about my weight, which always makes me want to answer, "I weigh enough to crush you like a bug, so don't tempt me!"

In the hospitals defense, they went to a lot of trouble to make sure I was taken care of. A candy striper (or something similar) walked me through the correct lines, because it was set up like the DMV-- it took three lines to set up the physical. She then walked me to the first testing area. Shortly after the nurse got through shouting her way to a medical history, a guy showed up to translate for me. He stayed with me the rest of the visit (about an hour) to make sure I didn't have any communication problems. From what he said in passing to other employees, I gathered that his job was to babysit the elderly and foreigners. ;-)

I called my school before I left the hospital to make sure I had done everything and the secretary asked if she could pick up the results, because it would interfere with my teaching schedule. In typical Korean fashion, the rule is, if the tests are normal, anyone can pick them up, otherwise, only the patient. One would think that they could a) contact the patient in case of abnormal results, or b) seal the results in an envelope, but clearly that is not the case.

Anyway, with medical records (yea! I don't have TB!) and criminal background check in hand, I went to immigration day before yesterday and renewed my visa. Either they finally have enough copies of my diploma and transcripts on file (at least half a dozen) or that was last year's issue and now they are on to drugs and molestation.

Total cost: around US$250, not counting the gas money I paid my mom for the inordinate amount of running around she had to do.

That's pretty much been the height of excitement around here.

I've finally got a project on the needles, but it isn't getting anywhere fast. I'm not sure about my yarn choice, so I'm not bothering to take pictures. I've posted the finished pattern. I started with block three, because there are no nupps or other weird design elements in the center pattern. Of course, what I really ought to be doing is knitting something for my mom to take when I go home, but I'm pretty stingy about my knitting...

A Forest in Seoul and "Eco-mowers"

2008-05-21T00:47:00.005+09:00

This is going to be another drive by post. I'm madly trying to finish my coursework for my penultimate class for my MEd. However, I found time to go to a picnic in Seoul Forest on Buddha's birthday.

The forest is still new, so Seoul is clearly evident.

Even the drain covers are fancy.

Unlike the wine.

I didn't get a shot of the Dixie cups the wine was consumed from, but you get the idea.

Jennifer Teacher aka The Ball Buster

2008-05-08T22:53:00.004+09:00

So, I went to work today in a good mood. Last night, Joe and I had Amanda on the podcast and it was fun. I actually got to talk a little knitting. Not much, because we had already run about 90 minutes longer than intended, as we do every week, but whatever. We've pretty well established that neither of us is capable of thinking a thought that we don't utter. So, Amanda and I kept the knit-talk (is that knittish?) brief.

Yesterday, today, and tomorrow are "event days" at school, so I was in a good mood about that as well. Just one little meeting to get through. I'm sure you can see the fly in the ointment already.

About a week (maybe two) ago, all teachers were given a form to fill in showing what lessons they had remaining in each textbook for the next ten weeks. The purpose of the meeting was to discuss the results of our labors and any adjustments that needed to be made. To give you an idea of the amount of work involved, one teacher started doing hers about an hour before the meeting and finished on time.

However, another teacher came in 90 seconds before the meeting and we had the following conversation:

Him: "Um... I haven't finished the paperwork for the meeting."

Me (not surprised, since he generally starts any paperwork on the due date): "Well, just bring what you have so we can discuss that."

Him: ... (Deer in the headlights with crickets chirping in the background.)

Me: "Did you not finish or not begin?"

He hemmed and hawed and apologized, but this was pretty much the end of the conversation. I'm about as non-confrontational as they come, but his stuff is always late and this particular paperwork required little actual work to do. However, that's all I said. Really.

So, the meeting starts a few minutes later and when we took out our paperwork to get started, he started crying. I felt like complete shit until I rewound the conversation in my head. I don't think I was overly harsh, insomuch as I didn't actually scold him.

Later my boss pulled me aside and asked if I was the reason he cried. She then thanked me for putting the fear of God in him about getting it done. Yeah, nothing like tears to let me know I've done a good job.

Colbert v. Rain

2008-05-07T11:47:00.004+09:00

Of course, a dance-off with a Korean wouldn't be complete without a round of DDR.

080505 Rain dance-off with Stephen Colbert

Reason Korea is great #96

2008-04-27T11:01:00.004+09:00

I have pink eye. Okay, it's not a usual reason to celebrate a country, but bear with me. I went to the eye doctor yesterday (no appointment, I just dropped in.) I waited nearly five minutes before I was examined. It was hard to wait so long, but I'm a patient patient. Hehe.

Anyway, I had pink eye. Which I figured. Which was why I hauled myself to the doctor on a Saturday. As I was paying the receptionist, she apologized to me. Why, you may ask? Because my insurance wouldn't cover the visit, prescription, or follow-up. The cost of the visit and prescription together was right at $20. I'm guessing the follow-up will be in the $10 range. I think I'll live. ;-)

Now I'm wondering if I should take tomorrow off. There was a pink-eye epidemic in Seoul a couple of years ago-- I wouldn't want to become known as Pink-Eye Jennifer Teacher...Hmmm... the big struggle for workers in Korea: work even if dead vs. public health concerns. If my eye is still pink tomorrow, I'll call in. The crust is already gone, though, so I'm pretty sure I'll be fine. (Dammit!)

May the third time be the charm

2008-04-17T23:56:00.004+09:00

Well, after a mighty push of two consecutive weeks of working, Mr. Please-Be-My-X showed up at my door at 1AM Monday morning. He rang the bell for two hours before I clued in that I could disable it by taking if off the hook. (Hey, I've only lived here nine years, how could I be expected to know that.) It was a testament to a) his bull-headedness and b) Koreans' unwillingness to complain about noise. We used to have a wife beater next door that would have been in prime fight mode at that time. For the first time, I wished they hadn't moved. HE would have complained.

Anyway, he showed up at my school the next day looking like he'd spent the last year doing meth. My co-workers didn't even recognize him. He's lost about 75 pounds or more-- he's pretty scrawny now and shakes like Muhammad Ali. He gave me his usual story about things "not working out." I gave him some money and, what else, bought him another plane ticket home. (Yep, that's three.)

I heard from my sister-in-law that he actually made the flight. So, I will be sleeping easier tonight. To be honest, it was worth the cost of a plane ticket to know he's out of the country and won't be showing up in the middle of the night. I had been waiting for that visit since he arrived in country three weeks ago.
***
Other than that, things are rolling along as usual. I'm studying for my class, but not as much as I should be. It's interesting, but not as practical as I would have liked.

We recorded the fourth episode of the podcast last night. Five hours. The guest host was the Metropolitician aka FeetmanSeoul, co-host of Bomb English . He does a couple of other podcasts, too, as well as being a columnist for Ex-Pat Living in the Korea Herald, etc etc, you get the idea. He and Joe can conversate in a big way. Fortunately for me, he's a very knowledgable and interesting guy. We recorded from 10PM to 3AM. I'm glad that Joe is all into the editing and tech side. Actually, I've been slacking on that, too. He does the website, the editing, the posting, and I...show up to record. I can live with it if he can. ;-)

That's about it. My life these days is pretty much work, study, sleep. And yet, I'm not studying enough. I've got some long chapter books for school that have been taking my time (for the next two weeks, I'll be covering The Hobbit-- in four lessons). That, and I watched every episode of Firefly last weekend.

Why do Koreans love Nazis?

2008-04-06T13:08:00.003+09:00

Those of us that have been on the peninsula a while remember the Hitler bars in Seoul. We also remember how surprised everyone was by the German and Israeli embassies stepping in and basically demanding that they be closed down.

We also remember the much more recent racist comic books (the anti-Semitic ones mostly follow the anti-Black and anti-immigrant ones) which caused an uproar that seemed to catch (Korean) people by surprise.

Now we have a skin whitener (no the irony is NOT lost on me) claiming that their product is revolutionary, like Hitler. Seriously. I could not make up idiocy this extreme.

Yes, these are the same people who can work themselves into a lather over the Evil Empire of Japan. I guess it's only bad behavior when Koreans are on the losing end...

Another Drive-By Post

2008-03-28T12:22:00.006+09:00

Well, I haven't gone insane yet, but I can feel myself slowly losing my grasp on sanity. I have been going through some kind of weird insomnia where I lie in bed for hours staring at the ceiling and then wake up tired (since I work evenings, I could sleep pretty late, but can't seem to sleep past 9:00). I haven't had anything on the needles in weeks, since I finished that pair of rib socks which someday I'll post an FO photo of.

I'm knee deep in my CALL class for my MEd. The instructor is, how shall I say, a sadist. We are doing all of the work of a face-to-face class, including discussion. Since this class is asynchronous, this means wading through 50+ emails a day from my classmates, which I am supposed to comment on/ further contribute to the "discussion." This is in addition to weekly assignments. I haven't even started thinking about my major project which, as you may have guessed, will be a major undertaking.

Tomorrow is the KOTESOL Seoul Chapter conference, where I'll be in charge of volunteers and whatever as needed.

Today, the first episode of Seoul Podcast was uploaded. Check it out. Karl was our guest host and we caught up with what he's been doing his first month back in Canada.

So, that's my life at the moment.

If you ever wondered what my life in Korea is like...

2008-03-19T00:00:00.004+09:00

it's like this, with 98% less rapping and dancing.

I love to see foreigners go for the gusto. Koreans think we're all crazy anyway, why not confirm that by rapping on the bus, at the market, while enjoying a refreshing adult beverage at the Family Mart? :-)

This arrived in my mail box today

2008-03-12T11:25:00.002+09:00

Knitting & Crochet Pattern-A-Day Calendars
March, 2008
As always, please share the news!

2010 Submission Deadline

Dear Jennifer, Thank you for your past (and hopefully future) support of the knitting & crochet pattern-a-day calendars. We wanted to make everyone aware that the 2010 submission deadline will be November 1, 2008.

2009 Knitting Pattern-A-Day Calendar Thanks to everyone, our knitting calendar is out to the printer. It is my goal over the next 2 months to email everyone individually and let you know what date your pattern will appear in the 2009 calendar.

2009 Crochet Pattern-A-Day Calendar We are oooh so close. I am waiting for the final batches of patterns to come back from the editor and then it will be a mad dash to layout the remaining pages in InDesign and get these files off to the printer as well. In a continued effort to keep up communications, I will be emailling everyone to let them know what date their patterns will appear. I am hoping to complete this process by the end of June.

When to expect your 2009 CalendarIf you contributed to the 2009 calendar and are wondering when you can expect to receive your free calendar, you can expect it to arrive in the mail by October. As I send out periodic updates, I will include any up-to-date information I have from the printer and the distribution company. If you submitted to both calendars, the Knitting calendars will arrive first and the Crochet calendars will be close behind.

Submission Tips:
Have you ever submitted a pattern and wondered why it wasn't included in the calendar? Most likely there was an error in the pattern or your photo was not high enough resolution.

Avoiding Pattern Errors:
Try to have someone you know reproduce your pattern.Submit early! The sooner you submit your pattern, the more time we have to review your pattern and work with you to resolve problem areas in the pattern.

Image Resolution:
If you are using a digital camera, look for a setting called image size, resolution, or pixels and use the highest setting possible.If you are scanning a photograph, scan at 300 dpi.Images that are optimized for website are typically too small and will print blurry.

Susan Ripley, Ripley Designs, Inc.
Click Here to Submit Your Pattern!

If there is justifiable homicide, why is this considered the work of a lunatic?

2008-03-12T11:16:00.003+09:00

Quite possibly the most annoying man in the known universe No Hong-Chul was attacked.
Is there a fund for this so-called crazy person's defense fund?

Designer clothes let people know if you are good or bad

2008-02-28T23:10:00.003+09:00

So sayeth one of my students. We were practicing brainstorming and the topic was "clothes". Most of the other students came up with: you can express your personality, you are protected from the weather, etc.

This was par for the course from this particular student. He can endlessly discuss the cost of latest acquisitions. ("My phone cost $900!") Pretty much every class, I want to look at him and say, "We've got it-- your parents are willing to waste insane amounts of money.")

Of course, as a teacher, I love all my students equally. ;-)

A Brand-Spanking New Nephew

2008-02-18T11:41:00.002+09:00

How beautiful is he? He is my oldest brother's second child and my fifth nephew/ niece.

Namdaemun Down in Flames

2008-02-12T00:26:00.000+09:00

Last night, "a guy in his 50s" torched Namdaemun-- Korea's national treasure number 1. Karl thinks National Treasure number 2 played a role. Joking aside, I really can't express how I feel about this.

I am more than a little angry that the nation has literal hordes of riot police to "protect" every square inch of Seoul were one might run into an American, but they can't spare one or two to guard it's number one national treasure?

Apparently, some of the blame lies with the firefighters who "thought" the fire had been extinguished. You know, in some countries, firefighters check every inch of a fire to check for smoldering... The president-elect has said it will cost $21 million and take three years to rebuild.

Update: A classic example of why Korea will always be foreign to me. The arsonist has been caught. He was trying to get attention to his cause (a property compensation dispute) and was caught last year trying to burn down one of the palaces. Are you kidding me? Seriously, is there any other culture where that would make sense? This is like someone in the US destroying the Liberty Bell to protest losing part of their yard to a road widening project.

There's a new Yacht Rock!

2008-02-12T00:18:00.000+09:00

Check it out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nX1Nh6c80wo

If you haven't seen it before and are "of a certain age" (40ish), you have to watch Yacht Rock. It's a mockumentary behind the scenes of 80s "smooth music" and is hilarious. The production values are proudly backyard, but that is actually part of the appeal, IMHO, and the stories will make you laugh out loud.

Sigh... Vacation is Over

2008-02-10T19:00:00.000+09:00

Short but sweet. I did not leave my abode for three consecutive days. maybe not something to brag about, but fun nonetheless.

I read three books. Two were for school, though, so they had to be read anyway.

Before I go to bed tonight I will have finished a pair of socks. No photos yet. Here is the scarf I've been knitting for my sister to go with the LSU Tychus I knit her for Christmas (but still haven't mailed):

Perhaps you can see the problem. I've started and frogged seven or eight different patterns that I ended up not liking. Maybe she wouldn't mind just wrapping the yarn around her neck... Students like to make fashion statements, right?

While I'm showing exciting photos of unknit yarn, here are my wound skeins for the first round of Sock Madness 2. Yes, that's lace weight. Lace. Socks. It's going to be doubled, but it will still require very small needles in order to create sock fabric. I'm hoping 2mm will do, since that's the smallest I can get here.

My cat has been busy this week playing hide-and-seek. I don't think he quite knows what to do with so much company; he hasn't had this much constant companionship since I successfully jetisonned Mr. Please-Be-My-Ex. You might notice his hiding skills are, um, rusty. I was changing the sheets when he "hid" here. That's just poor strategy.

새해복많이받으세요

2008-02-07T20:19:00.000+09:00

Or, in English, "Happy New Year!" (basically)

The traditional soup to eat on New Year's Day is Rice Cake Soup, which helps you become a year older (since everyone gets older on New Year's Day, don't you know). However, Rice Cake Soup is somewhat lacking in delicious-ness, if you know what I mean. If you've ever eaten homemade play-doh, you DO know what I mean-- just imagine it in boiling water. Yum! So, this year, try this Chinese version of a Korean favorite instead:

Mmmm... that's right. In just three minutes you can have a nice steaming bowl of dog ramyeon. Don't you just wish there were a Chinese grocer near you?

The End of an Era

2008-02-03T00:41:00.000+09:00

Well, after nearly a year, the podcast I've been doing has come to an end so Karl can move back to Toronto. We recorded the final podcast at my apartment and it ended up being a three hour extravaganza of the usual rambling and nonsense (this week with 50% more rambling!). Don't despair, Joe and I have a new podcast in the works, tentatively planned to begin at the end of March.

If you are asking yourself, "What podcast?" you can listen to the last episode here:
Part 1-- Disclaimer: I am not Cajun, people from outside of Louisiana just lump us all together.:-)
Part 2
Part 3

If three hours just aren't enough, you can listen to the previous 58 episodes (I'm only on the ones since February or March of last year, though). OR:
You can check out Joe's blog here.
You can check out Karl's writing here and here and Franglais lessons here.
You can check out Karl's other podcast here.

What with Karl being quoted by the BBC and Joe being in the New York Times (not to mention his biweekly column (click Expat Living) in the local tissue, uh, I mean newspaper), I'm basically the unknown loser of the podcast.

From the Mouths of Babes (or Hands)

2008-01-28T21:01:00.001+09:00

We've been giving our students timed essays over the winter camp and this is what two of my second-graders wrote to answer the prompt, "If you could by any age, what would it be and why?"

So, one wants to be 33 to experience the joys of cooking and cleaning (aim high!) and the other wants to be 34 to by-pass the "ouchy"-ness of childbirth because having a baby is like having a monster cut out of you. Days like this make me truly love being a teacher. :-)

Free Beer and Animal Hats

2008-01-18T18:03:00.000+09:00

My local grocery store has been running a Heineken campaign lately, which means, what else-- free beer samples. Today, I finally decided to play the crazy foreigner card and take a photo of the Heine Girl.

***
I've also been taking photos of one of my students this week. He went to Everland ("the Disney World of Korea" hahaha) last weekend and got himself a stylish hat collection. He happily posed for pics, but wouldn't arrange the lemur hat to show the nose. Brat. ;-)

Winter camp is now 60% complete, which means... two weeks until vacation!!! I'm starting to wish I had bought tickets for somewhere. Oh, well, I'll stay here and torture my kitty with static electricity nose kisses.

Mmmm...Puppylicious!

2008-01-12T18:19:00.000+09:00

On the way home from the dentist (again!) today, my coworker and I stopped at Moran Market to see the dog stalls (for dog meat, not pets).

I saw dogs which were crammed in far worse than in this photo, but the vendors know that there's only one reason foreigners go there and they aren't happy to see us. So, this was the best photo I could take on the sly.

I also saw goats, birds (some of which were packaged in mesh bags-- like for onions-- still alive), and cats. Next to the cages were prepared cuts of meat. One cage had a partially processed dog lying on the top of it, waiting to be butchered.

I wanted to get a photo of the dog restaurant with a smiling dog on the sign, but we were stopped and questioned by some unfriendly types and thought it best to head back to the main road.

***
At the dentist, I finally got the tooth fixed that I chipped in October. After the Summer of Dental Repairs, I was pretty used to some nice discounts, so I have to admit I wasn't too pleased to pay $100 for the repair, since it literally took 5 minutes. Yes, I am completely ungrateful, I know, especially since that tooth now looks better than the ones around it.

Would it be wrong to steal from a student?

2008-01-08T20:52:00.001+09:00

This awesome product made its debut in my classroom today. I whipped out my camera and had my student pose. This was too good for a surreptitious photo.

Check out the link if you want to learn the secret to the ultra-delicious-ness of Korean pizza. This is the guy I do the podcast with. Lest you think it's just a joke, let me assure you, products much like this are available at any bakery (and some "pizzarias"). Yum!

Now, take these scissors from Mommy and run as fast as you can...

2008-01-07T20:41:00.000+09:00

For nearly ten years now, I've been watching Korean parenting with one hand covering my eyes. While mothers in the US may at times seem to think children can die of a stubbed toe, Korean moms tend to behave as though their children are bullet proof.

I've grown accustomed to kids jumping on and off curbs while their mothers look for the bus and toddlers wandering unattended in shops. Usually, the mothers are just oblivious to their children's near brushes with death/ dismemberment/ doom. Yesterday, I actually saw one applauding her child for his death-defying derring-do.

So, I was walking through Kangnam Station in Seoul, which as usual was so packed a person could probably die and just be swept along by the crowd. A little boy and his mother were completely lost in their own world, though. He was pirouetting on one foot while practicing his roundhouse kicks with the other all while eating street food (served on a sharpened stake, of course) all at the same time. His mother was competing for parent of the year by... cheering him along.

I really wanted to hang around and watch for the inevitable, but crowds like that make me want to hurt people.

NOOOOOOO! The Sound of a Thousand Stitches Felting

2007-12-23T17:29:00.000+09:00

This is why I prefer superwash, despite the million and one horrible chemicals needed to process the wool:

My Zoknis are now toddler-sized after an unfortunate meeting with hot water.

I'll just have to make more time to knit and replace them. They were a pretty fun knit, so I may actually reknit the same pattern. Or not. So many patterns... and thanks to school, so little time to knit.

I was leaving school Thursday when my academic director asked me to "help her out" preparing for Winter Camp (beginning 31 December). Well, since I'll be doing Jazz hands for a month if there is nothing planned, um, I guess I might as well help.

Help. To me that means, assisting. You know, supplementing someone else's efforts. I have clearly been operating under false assumptions.

The only thing "prepared" are the classes that use textbooks (IE no non-teacher prep required). So, by tomorrow (Monday), I am to have packets prepared for film discussion, writing, social studies, and a project class for each academic level. Hahahahaha. One might think that Winter Camp didn't happen at the same time each year.

I have decided that teachers can decide what their students don't need/ are not capable of doing (and can then remove from their packets). In other words, I'm basically going to prepare one packet for each subject. That's what you get with 72 hours notice. Sorry. I've got 16 hours of not-at-all-voluntary overtime (including Saturday, which is NOT a workday, nor is it being compensated at a higher rate than the rest) this week, which hasn't put me in a mood to kill myself working at home.

Merry Christmas to me.

Answer: Pfffffff-fff-ffff-fffffff-fft

2007-12-16T18:26:00.000+09:00

Question: What sound do you not want to hear in an elevator?

You know, whenever my students tell me they go to etiquette hagwon, I always have a sarcastic chuckle to myself:

Lesson 1- Sidewalk spitting
Lesson 2- Properly blocking both subway doors when not actually exiting
Lesson 3- Advanced elbowing
Lesson 4- Supermarket bumper carts

I always assume that there is a limit to what Westerners consider rude, but Koreans consider normal. That line gets pushed farther back the longer I am here, but I always assume it's there, lurking in the shadows somewhere.

However, I got on the elevator the other day and what did I here? Not Jingle Bells! As soon as the doors closed, this guy, who had quietly (fart-lessly) been waiting at the elevator, let one rip that lasted several floors. It was all I could to not to turn around to see if he was leaning into it for added leverage.

Did he think I wouldn't know what was happening because he was behind me?

Santa Claus Came to Town

2007-12-09T19:45:00.001+09:00

Okay, it was really my dad, but I think we already knew his true identity.

I got a great package from my dad and stepmother: a knitting book from Nicky Epstein, a retro Barbie to go with the book (unfortunately they gift wrapped it, so customs sliced the box with a box cutter to check under the wrapping), some KnitPicks yarn, size 9 needles, and cash! I have to say, getting cash makes me feel like a kid again. ;-)

It came at the perfect time-- I've been sick for about 10 days. Last week, I had a headache that would not go away no matter how many painkillers I took. This week, the headache has been replaced with a head cold and no voice.

Now, for some long overdue FO shots:

This is a Noro hat that I knit top down using a Feather and Fan stitch pattern over 72 stitches. I used an entire skein of Noro Kureyon (uhhh...153?159?), when it got close to to the end, I knit 10 rows of k2p2 rib. It only took a couple of hours.

My sister goes to LSU, so I knit her an LSU Tychus. This is from the yarn I got from the yarn and fiber company (free international shipping!) a couple of months ago. I could link back to that post, but that would take too much effort. Another quick, fun knit.

I finally knit up the MCY Eternity I got this summer and have been swatching with extreme regularity ever since. There was a mini-skein, thanks to a knot, that looks quite raveled and worn, but it all turned out all right. I used a scroll pattern, like the one used in various sock patterns, but I only wanted to have patterned legs. These were knit toe-up, of course. They are pretty tall, but I've got a lot of yarn left over. They are very pretty. The colors don't show up well in the photo, but there are all shades of blues from teal to periwinkle.

Since I finished the Eternity socks and was drooling over their perfect lack of flashing and pooling, I quickly balled up the other yarn I had ordered at the same time. NOT HAPPY.

You may notice that there are three balls in the photo. That is because the yarn came in three pieces. No knots, pieces. Still, the eternity socks are beautiful, so I cast on, undeterred. I got about two inches in and realized that I will have to alternate skeins (handily, I have pre-divided yarn), because the color repeats are too short and one side has no yellow. So, know I'm contemplating frogging and starting over, or living with a toe that will not match its mate.

If you know me, and most of you do, you know that I can live with a lot if it means the difference between starting over and carrying on. Toes stay in shoes, anyway...

I want her free time

2007-11-20T21:23:00.000+09:00

Shib - Flickr 에서 사진 공유하기!
Yes, I'm still tech-deficient and can't figure out how to upload someone else's photos. Also, some might call that stealing. I live in Korea, so... no one here, but somewhere.

She entered (but didn't win) Crazy Aunt Purl's Drunk, Divorced, and Covered in Cat Sweater Contest. Try saying that three times fast.

Category: Small World

2007-11-20T10:43:00.000+09:00

A friend of my mom's was at the Louisiana Book Fest and saw a knitter and told her that she knows a knitter in Korea. As it turns out (here's the small world part) the girl reads my blog and is moving to Korea! So, if you're "the girl" let me know so we can meet up some time!

The Monster Mash

2007-11-13T11:47:00.000+09:00

is my current choice for what the bereaved will have to lip-sync at my funeral. If I can't have a groom lip-syncing to me a song extolling the joys of female masturbation (see previous post), it's the next best thing. As you can see, I've been giving this a lot of thought. But I feel robbed. First, neither my ex nor I thought of getting engaged OR married on TV. I know, how old are we? Then, we got married without a chariot OR dancing girls OR canned snow OR a slutty "singer" to congratulate us while dancing inappropriately (not to mention singing inappropriately).

Since I don't really see myself getting married again, my funeral is my only chance. Do you think Chippendales do funerals? What kind of donation would it take to get the priest to join in? Instead of dropping a flower into the casket, my family could spray snow over me, or Silly String. I've never seen the confetti bombs that you get in Korea with cakes in the US, but maybe they are sold at Asian markets...

Obviously I've got a lot more planning to do.

Dancing Girls and Wedding Halls-- Two Korean greats that go great together

2007-11-10T12:15:00.000+09:00

Since I have come to Korea, two things have fascinated me- tacky wedding halls that look like castles and perform ceremonies with the warmth and efficiency of a factory and slutty dancing girls that signal the opening of just about any new business.

Now, some enterprising wedding hall has joined these two cultural traditions in an unholy marriage (pardon the pun). I wonder if these are the most over-dressed dancing girls ever out of a sign of respect for the solemnity of the occasion. Notice the bride's reaction. I wonder if she even knew it was part of the ceremony.

http://video.naver.com/2007110514163599100

You may think a few seconds is long enough, but keep watching until the groom joins in and lip-syncs to his blushing bride and the finale with the girls spraying canned snow. I only wish there was a close up of the officiant's face. You can see one of the fathers-in-law seems unimpressed. Unfortunately, most of the video is shot facing the other father-in-law, who just watches stoically.

Here's another video from that wedding, in case one wasn't enough. In this one, the bride and groom are congratulated in song and booty dance at the end of the ceremony. The singer can't really sing (or booty dance, for that matter), so the guests aren't really even pretending to be enthusiastic. Korean weddings usually last about 15 minutes, so they are probably pretty antsy by this point.

http://video.naver.com/2007110513441605518

I tried to embed the video like normal people, but we all know that I'm not "normal people" when it comes to technology. Maybe when I can drag and drop...

I didn't die, but my computer did

2007-11-07T11:07:00.000+09:00

I can't believe it's been almost a month since I last posted. My excuses (and there are many) are:

my computer had to get a new hard drive after being pounced on by a certain cat too many times
less than one week after my hard drive was repaired, my ISP external device (like a modem, but I have an internal modem, I really have no idea what it is, but unless you use wireless in Korea, you have to have one from your service provider) died-- possibly also a result of too many pouncing-upons (no immobile target too immobile for my kitty)
I was a volunteer manager at this year's KOTESOL international conference week before last. It was the usual extravaganza of stress and no sleep
I'm still training my no-longer-quite-so-new teachers

So not only have I not been posting, I also haven't been working on the pattern I was supposed to submit for Sock Madness 2. Apparently, I'm not the only one.

I have a ton of photos to submit, but I need to be getting ready for work, so I'll just leave you with today's PSA: back up your files, especially photos and other files you can't replace. It cost me $200 to get my files retrieved off of my old hard drive and I pretty much had to beg them, then yell at them, to get them to do it. You know, of course, that by "yell at them" I mean "had a Korean yell at them so it made sense and they could understand", right?

"She looks much thinner now." This moment brought to you by Korea

2007-10-13T15:07:00.000+09:00

Friday a week ago, my director became a grandmother when her oldest daughter gave birth. Said birth was by Cesarean, so when I saw the director, I asked how her daughter was doing. Korean is a rather pedantic language so I couldn't simply ask about her health, because she hasn't been sick. The proper question basically translates to, "How is her body?"

The response? She looked up from the paperwork she had been attending to and very seriously said, "Oh, she looks much thinner now."

Well, thank goodness! It would be a tragedy if after having an 8 pound child cut out of her, she didn't look better.

A follow up question got me the sought after information-- mother and child are healthy. She never seemed to realize that my initial concern was other than her daughter's baby weight.

So now my dilemma is too knit or not to knit. I taught said daughter how to knit several years ago, when she was trying to impress her future husband by knitting him a scarf. So, she knows I knit. However, she's... exacting (spoiled) and I'm not sure *homemade* would suit her designer tastes. (The scarf never got past gauge swatch size-- it was too much work.)